The Manager Just Got Burned

| Working | May 25, 2014

(There’s a local branch of a nationwide pizza chain that, surprisingly, ACTUALLY makes the best pizza in town. However, a new store manager has come in lately and since then, things have been a little wonky, like toppings missing or the wrong sizes being made. This happened last night when I call and ask to talk to the manager.)

Me: “I just ordered three large with extra cheese from you guys, and two of them are fine but one is completely burnt.

Manager: “No, it isn’t.”

Me: “Yeah, it is. Two of them are perfect golden brown, but one is darker than the table it’s sitting on with great big burnt-black bubbles in the crust and cheese.”

Manager: “Nope.”

Me: “What do you mean, ‘nope’?”

Manager: “We cook all our pizzas the same. It’s in a set oven on a timer.”

Me: “Then obviously something went wrong with this one. I’d like it replaced.”

Manager: “I’m not going to replace a perfectly fine pizza. You just want a free one.”

Me: “How about I come down and SHOW YOU the burnt one, and if it’s burnt you’re refunding my ENTIRE order?”

Manager: “It’s not burnt!”

(At this point I hang the phone up, grab the obviously burnt pizza, and head down to the shop. The other three people working there all agreed it was burned and get to work on a replacement, but the manager suddenly storms out.)

Manager: “DON’T YOU GIVE HIM A THING. That pizza’s fine!”

Clerk: “Um, no, it’s not. LOOK at this!”

Manager: “Yeah. It’s properly cooked!”

Clerk: “No, it’s NOT. It’s completely burned!”

Manager: “Look, I’ve been doing this for 10 years. This is why I keep telling you people to watch the pizzas. You keep undercooking them, then I have to fix them!”

Clerk #2: “Wait a minute. YOU’VE been overcooking them!?”

Manager: “No, I’ve been FIXING them!”

(At this point the first clerk took me aside, promised me a fresh pie ASAP, and refunded my bill without even asking me. It turned out the manager was pushing his personal preference off on the customers and they were getting five to ten calls a night to fix burnt pizzas!)

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