The Lord Giveth And The Bank Taketh Away
A woman storms into the lobby and slams her purse onto my desk.
Customer: “You stole my money from God!”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “God sent me money, and you stole it!”
Me: “Ma’am, I’ve never met you before.”
Customer: “Don’t play dumb with me! I prayed to God for money, and He sent me a check! I deposited my check, and now all the money is gone!”
I go through the security questions and pull up her account.
Me: “Well… the account is heavily overdrawn, so the deposit went toward the negative balance.”
Customer: “No! That was Jesus’s money! It was a blessing!”
Me: “It was still deposited into the account, ma’am.”
Customer: “So you admit you took God’s money?!”
Me: “The bank applied the funds to the overdraft balance.”
Customer: “I want my blessing back!”
At this point, I’m honestly too tired to deal with her.
Me: “Okay. I can reverse the deposit and give you the check back.”
Customer: “Finally! The power of God compelled you!”
I reverse the transaction and hand her the check. Also turns out Jesus works at Taco Bell because that’s where the check came from.
