The Lawnmower Man

, , , , , | Friendly | October 27, 2017

(This takes place when I am in grade 12. We have exam blocks for the final week of each term. If you have a subject that has exams — not all subjects do — you have to go to sit it, but all the other days you can stay home. I catch a flu in June, which is winter for us, at the end of the second term. It is quite bad, but I get to spend most of the week at home except for when I have my maths exam. I have to walk to the school to take it, so by the time I get there, I already feel quite sick. In the middle of the exam, however, I have a violent coughing spurt, to the extent that I can barely breathe. You’re only allowed your pencil case and water during the exam, so there is nothing I can do except wait for it to pass. Despite teachers patrolling to ensure no cheating, none bother to help me. After about fifteen minutes of solid coughing and hacking, it subsides and I can get on with the exam. This occurs afterwards.)

Me: *to my best friend* “How do you think it went?”

Friend #1: “I think I did okay, but did you hear that coughing during the exam?”

(I didn’t hear anyone coughing aside from myself.)

Friend #2: “I know! It was so loud! It sounded like a dying lawn mower!”

Me: “…”

Friend #1: *laughs loudly*

Friend #2: *turning to me* “Did you hear it?”

Me: *long pause* “That was me; I have the flu.”

Friend #2: “Oh. Well, you sounded like a dying lawn mower!”

(Both friends started laughing. Thanks for the support, guys. I felt horribly sick, could barely breathe, and nearly passed out, but it’s good to know I sounded like a dying lawn mower.)

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