The Highest Expectations For Their Birthday

(It’s near my birthday. My 87-year-old great grandma always gives me money, but she always sneaks it into my hand like it’s a secret.)

Me: “You always give me money like I’m some kind of drug dealer.”

Great Grandma: “Well, where are the drugs?”

Me: “I don’t have any drugs for you today.”

Great Grandma: “Aw, well. That’s too bad.”