The Hardest Workout Is Cancelling

| Working | July 21, 2017

(I decide that I’m getting too unfit, so I go to a gym to join. I pick one closest to my house and walk in. After explaining, they send a salesman to talk with me and fill out forms.)

Salesman: “You should buy a personal trainer.”

Me: “No, thanks.”

Salesman: “You can always quit if you don’t like it. Why don’t you try?”

Me: *hoping to move things along* “Ok, fine.”

(After trying out the personal trainer, I find him very bad as I expected. So I call up the gym.)

Gym: “Hello?”

Me: “May I speak with the manager.”

Gym: “One moment.”

Manager: “Can I help you?”

Me: “Yes, I bought a personal trainer package, but I don’t like him. Do I have to go to the gym to cancel him, or can you do it for me over the phone?”

Manager: “…you don’t have to come. It’s done.”

Me: “It’s done?”

Manager: “Yep.”

Me: “Thanks so much! What’s your name?”

Manager: “[Name]. Bye.”

(So I’m think everything’s okay, until some time later I look at my credit card bill and see that the gym is STILL taking out money for the personal trainer! So I go to the gym.)

Me: “Hello, I have canceled this personal training and it’s still charging me for it!”

Clerk: “Hold on, I’ll get the manager.”

Manager: *grinning* “Hello.”

Me: “Hello, I have canceled the personal training over the phone–”

Manager: “No, you need to come to the gym to do it.”

Me: “What? But the manager I spoke to on the phone said it was all canceled!”

Manager: “None of our managers said they spoke to you.”

Me: “Well, can you cancel it?”

Manager: “No, it’s already past the cancellation date. Why don’t you try another trainer?”

Me: “No! I want this cancelled! Some employee of yours lied to me!”

Manager: “Tell me who!”

Me: “[Name]!”

Manager: *grinning* “There’s no [Name] here. TELL ME WHO SO I KNOW WHO TO FIRE!”

Me: “That’s it. Please cancel my membership.”

(He did, still grinning away like a maniac, refusing to refund my money. I made sure to get his name and a cancellation confirmation. Later, I talked to my bank about the charges, and they helped me get my charges refunded. Sad that some dishonest employee made me go further to another gym, but… the real kicker is that that gym keeps sending me junk mail, begging me to sign up with them! No thanks!)

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