The Great (Aunt) Escape

Coworker: “I need some time off. My aunt just died.”

Me: “Oh, no. Was it [Aunt #1]? I’d heard she hasn’t been ‘all there’ lately.”

Coworker: “No, it was my other aunt.”

Me: “[Aunt #2]? Oh, that must have been a shock. I’ll have to drop by [Aunt’s Daughter]’s this afternoon and give her my regards.”

Coworker: “Urgh, no. Another aunt.”

Me: “Well, I can only think of [Great Aunt], but I spoke to her this morning.”

Coworker: *confused stare*

Me: *realising* “No one has died.”

Coworker: “No…”

Me: “Should we just forget what you were trying to do?”

Coworker: “I think so… but how do you know my aunts?”

Me: “I went to school with [Aunts #1 & #2], and [Great Aunt] used to babysit us. She’s also my neighbour.”

Coworker: “Okay, so, I guess I completely f***ed up?”

Me: “Yes, you did.”

(I had a chat with his aunts later, and while mortified they also found it hilarious. Honestly, though, what would you expect living in a small coastal town?! Everyone knows each other!)