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The Good, The Bad, And The Manbun

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: ppgoodstorytime20 | July 5, 2021

Today was a strange day. I was just studying for a test when, around 10:00 am, I realized that I’d run out of snacks. I headed to a big chain store a few blocks from home.

I am about six feet tall and have long hair for a guy. I’m about sixteen years old and am apparently an old people magnet in stores. Because of my purple jacket, black pants, manbun, and earphones in blasting rap music, I don’t really look like an employee, or so I thought.

I was just browsing the store to find some snacks and maybe something for dinner that day. As I ducked to search between the salted nuts for a decent-looking bag, I felt a hard tap on my shoulder. I turned my music off and turned around, only to see a nice old lady.

Lady #1: “Could you help me?”

I always get asked to help by old ladies. I don’t know why, but they always seem to like me.

Me: “Sure, what can I help with?”

Lady #1: “I want a microwave, but I can’t lift it into my cart.”

Me: “I’ll come with so I can help.”

I already had everything I needed now, so I just tagged along with the nice lady and help her with putting the microwave in her cart and onto the belt. I kept talking to the nice old lady.

Lady #1: “Why are you being so nice to me?”

Me: “I just try to help elderly people when I can.”

Lady #1: “Here, let me pay for your things.”

Me: “Oh, no, thank you. I’ve got my card ready already.”

When I put her microwave in her trunk, she slid a 10€ bill into my hand.

Lady #1: “It’s good to see that some people still behave well.”

After the nice old lady drove off, I realized that I had forgotten to buy potatoes for dinner, so I ran home, dropped everything off, and went back into the store. This time was less wholesome.

I entered the store and went immediately to the potatoes. I dug around to find the perfect bag. As I was lifting the big bag onto my cart, I heard a groan and the tapping of a shoe on the tiled floor. Thinking that I was standing in the way, I tried to move aside, but the woman standing there wasn’t having it; she started to groan even louder.

I turned around and saw a woman around sixty dressed like a woman in her twenties.

Lady #2: *Loudly* “Finally! I have been trying to get your attention for at least five minutes now!”

Me: “Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”

Lady #2: *Screaming* “I demand that you help me put my stuff in my car after I pay for it!”

That’s right, demanding, not asking.

Me: “I’m not going to do that; you screamed at me.”

Lady #2: “You have no choice; you have to. It’s your job. I saw you outside helping that other lady fifteen minutes ago.”

Me: “First of all, I am not an employee here, and second of all, if I was, I’d decline to help you due to your behavior toward me just now.”

Then, I tried to walk away, but she tried to push me aside. She pushed harder than I expected and I ended up tripping over a tile that was sticking out partially and faceplanted into the aisle next to me. The woman clearly knew what she’d done, and started screaming:

Lady #2: “Ahhh! No! Don’t touch me!”

I was completely stunned by her actions, so I didn’t know what to say. An employee arrived and the lady started crying and telling him a bunch of lies as they walked to the closest bench so “she could sit to rest after being jumped.”

I tried to get back up myself, but due to my bad landing, I’d managed to hurt my back and couldn’t balance myself properly, so I just decided to just lay down and wait until someone arrived. Luckily, an old man saw everything and came up to me to help me up.

Me: “No, no, I can wait. I don’t want you to hurt your back helping me up.”

The old guy wasn’t taking no for an answer; he just picked me up gently and gave me his cane to lean on.

Man: *With a giggle* “My wife makes me use it just in case, but I don’t need it now.”

Me: “Thanks.”

Then, the manager arrived, looking unhappy. Then, he saw me barely able to stand, and the old man. He asked me what happened and I told him my story. The old guy backed me up.

Manager: “The police are already on their way. You can stay in my office until they get here.”

When we started to hear sirens, I got scared. I was an underage boy with a manbun being accused of assaulting an old lady, so in my head my life was over. I was trying not to puke out of.

The police arrived and the lady told them her story.

Lady #2: “He should be fired!

Because, yeah, the police can fire me from a store where I don’t work. They came to me and started asking me questions. The old guy was still with us and was getting bored.

Man: “[Manager], just show them the camera footage instead of wasting this kid’s time.”

Manager: “Okay, here.”

He turned his screen to show us the entire thing on security footage. I was so relieved to know that I had proof now.

Police Officer: “Would you like to press charges?”

Me: “I’ll talk to my parents and contact you later.”

He gave me his details and we walked out. The officer then cuffed the lady and she kept screaming all the way to the car.

I ended up buying the old guy’s groceries as a thank-you for helping me. I suffered no permanent damage. The lady was banned from the store and is now facing a lawsuit.

Was it worth it? Probably not. Was it on purpose? Probably not. Did she deserve it? Definitely!

Question of the Week

What is the absolute most stupid thing you’ve heard a customer say?

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