The Girl Who Played With Fire
(I am a clumsy person. I’ve burned myself while cooking four times in the last week, and have a bag of ice on the newest burn.)
Husband: “You have got to quit burning yourself!”
Me: “It’s not like I do it on purpose! Besides, I do it in phases.”
Husband: “Yeah, phases of once a day!”
Me: “No! I’ve burned myself four times in the last week, and it’s the only times I’ve burned myself all year!”