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The Drugs Don’t Work, They Just Make It Worse

| Working | July 16, 2013

(My mom and I are in an accident, and our vehicle rolls four times. While I am fine, my mom has to be taken to the emergency room. My dad goes in back with her while I go into the waiting room with the rest of the family. Before the ambulance even takes my mom, they ask my dad if she is allergic to any medications, and write these on papers which they give to the ER nurses.)

Doctor: “Okay, according to the x-rays and scans, you have a cranial contusion, a deep laceration that required staples, a hairline fracture on the left side of your collar bone, and some bruised ribs. For the pain we’re going to give you a morphine drip.”

Mom: “Like h*** you are!”

Dad: “Calm down.” *to the doctor* “You can’t give her that. She’s allergic to opiates, even the synthetics. It should say so on the papers.”

Doctor: “Oh, it does, doesn’t it? Okay, then we’ll give her Loritab.”

Mom: “Are you trying to f****** kill me?”

Dad: “That’s an opiate too.”

Doctor: “Oh, yeah, it is.”

Mom: “Just give me prescription-strength Tylenol! I’m allergic to everything else!”

Doctor: “Oh, no, that won’t do!”

(He starts listing off other painkillers, all of which are opiates or synthetic opiates.)

Mom: “No, no, no, and no! Just get me some f****** prescription-strength Tylenol, and go the f*** away!”

Dad: “Please do as she asks!”

Doctor: “Fine!”

(I’m glad to say my mom is doing fine now. We will NEVER go back to that hospital if we can help it!)

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