The Customers Of Checkouts’ Past

(I am working on the last open checkout on Christmas Eve, about thirty minutes before we finish early for the night.)

Supervisor: *showing up at checkout without warning* “Can you finish up with this customer, and then see [Manager]?”

Me: “Um, sure?”

(I finish up with the customer, then head over.)

Manager: “I’m afraid you’ve just had a customer complaint.”

(A customer I had served some fifteen minutes beforehand, seeing I am being spoken to, decides to storm over to us from the customer service desk.)

Customer: “YES! That’s him!”

Manager: *looking me dead in the eye with an all-consuming seriousness* “The customer has complained that you were too cheery… Keep it up! In fact, you can clock out early; have a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!” *waves happily at me*

(As I was walking away, I heard the customer screaming about how she [the manager] would never work at this store again… promptly followed by some random guy with a gruff Glaswegian accent: “And a merry f****** Christmas to you, too!” It was magical!)