The Customer Has Too Much Data
I have a coworker who is neurodivergent. He essentially takes most spoken phrases literally and has difficulty understanding some societal nuances. Funnily enough, he talks at length about his love for “Star Trek: The Next Generation” and how he relates to the character Data.
Customer: “I need to return this iPhone.”
Coworker: “What is the reason for the return?”
Customer: “It broke.”
The customer presents a phone with a cracked screen. The receipt puts it outside our return window.
Coworker: “Did you purchase a warranty with us or Apple?”
Customer: “I shouldn’t have to! It shouldn’t break so easily! I need this refunded!”
Coworker: “I’m afraid that if you’ve not purchased a warranty, there is nothing we can do.”
Customer: “Look! The customer is always right! I need—”
Coworker: “That’s not true.”
Customer: “What?”
Coworker: “You’re not right in this instance. And you’re a customer. Therefore, the customer cannot always be right.”
The customer is dumbfounded for a moment, as calling out the obviousness of the biggest fallacy in retail isn’t expected in our field.
Customer: “No… I mean, you have to do as I say! I need you to—”
Coworker: “That’s not true. I am here to service our customers within the store policies. Outside store policies, there is nothing I can do.”
Customer: “Then I need to speak to a manager!”
A manager is called, and the return is denied. As the customer storms out, she passes my coworker.
Customer: “And you! You… it’s like talking to a robot!”
Coworker: *Beaming* “Thank you!”
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Question of the Week
Have you ever met a customer who thought the world revolved around them?
