The Creamer Is Fat-Free-Free

I’m a stocker at a local supermarket. Today, I’m in the dairy department. I’ve just finished working the dairy load and I’m in the process of pulling the aisle forward when a customer comes up to me.

Customer: “Excuse me, do you have any more [Brand] fat-free vanilla caramel creamer in the back?”

Not only do we not carry the variety that she’s looking for, but it doesn’t even exist.

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, but [Brand] does not make a fat-free vanilla caramel creamer.”

Customer: “I know you sell it! I’ve bought it here before. I keep coming back and you never have it!”

Me: “[Brand] only makes vanilla caramel creamer in regular. You might have bought that previously, instead, and we have plenty on the shelf.”

Customer: “No! I want the fat-free [Brand] vanilla caramel!”

Me: “Again, we don’t carry it because it doesn’t exist. I guarantee you there’s not going to be any there.”

Customer: “Ugh, you’re so lazy! Stop wasting my time and go check for me!”

I give up and go to the back just to satisfy her. Surprise, surprise, we don’t have any of the creamer she wants.

Me: “Ma’am, I just checked, and I can confirm that there is absolutely no [Brand] fat-free caramel creamer.”

Customer: “Ugh, fine, I believe you. Now, can you tell me when your next order of [Brand] fat-free vanilla caramel creamer will come in?”

Cue internal facepalm. Such is the life of retail.