The Couponator 18: The Digital Revolution

, , , , , , , | Right | July 26, 2020

I work at a bulk membership club. The club is taking extra steps to ensure the health and safety of employees and customers during the current health crisis.

One of these steps is making all coupons digital-only: use the membership app and load them onto the card. However, some customers are so entrenched in the old way of physically clipping coupons that every day we get some variation of, “Well, I wasn’t informed…”

Me: “All right, that will be [amount].”

Customer: “Oh, wait. I have all these coupons.”

Me: “Ma’am, due to the outbreak, all of our coupons are done digitally now.”

Customer: “What? Since f****** when?”

Me: “Since the beginning of March, ma’am.”

Customer: “Well, nobody ever told me that.”

Me: “Ma’am, it says so on the first page of the coupon book, on the large sign at the front of the store, on the TVs that you passed by on your way in, and on the PA system every half-hour.”

Customer: “Well, I didn’t see or hear any of that, so you have to take my coupons.”

As I’m about to call a manager, the PA system starts the prerecorded spiel about digital coupons. I watch as the customer claps her hands over her ears.

Customer: *Very loudly* “This is age discrimination, you know. I’m too old to know how to use these app things and if you keep this s*** up, I’m going to complain to the State about this!”

My manager arrives and she says the following:

Manager: “Ma’am, first of all, I won’t have you swear at my cashier. He has tried to help you. And in reference to your last statement, I see you’re not carrying a flip phone, so your [Expensive Smartphone] should be able to handle our app.”

Customer: “No! This policy is f****** stupid, and I won’t download your stupid app just to use my coupons!”

Manager: *To me* “Void her transaction and ring up the next person in line.”

Customer: “How dare you?! I’m a f****** paying customer!”

Manager: “You’re verbally abusing my cashier because you’re unwilling to learn new things, so he’s going to ring the next person in line while I show you how to use the app. Then, you’re going to apologize to him for swearing at him for something that is out of his hands. Then, and only then, will he ring you out, and then you will be a ‘paying customer.’ Do I make myself clear?”

The customer was at least five inches taller than the manager, but the sternness in her voice made the customer back down and move out of the line. Ten minutes later, she very meekly apologized and checked out, not making eye contact with me. A small victory for essential workers, but it felt good.

Related:
The Couponator 17: Attack Of The “Programmer”
The Couponator 16: Enter The Entree
The Couponator 15: The Transaction Void
The Couponator 14: Multiple Attack
The Couponator 13: Coupons Of Purchases Past


This story is part of our July 2020 Roundup – the best stories of the month!

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