The Coffee Lasts Longer Than Their Friends

, , , | Right | September 24, 2018

(I am working in a call center taking customer service calls for a major food company that owns various food manufacturers. My supervisor is sitting next to me doing an evaluation.)

Me: “My name is [My Name]. How can I help you today?”

Caller: “Hi, I just called to say that my husband and I were just going through one of our dead friends’ homes and we found a twenty-year-old can of [Brand] coffee. When we took it home and opened it, it was still fresh! Your coffee is amazing.”

Me: “Uh, well, thank you, ma’am. I’ll be sure to pass that on. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Caller: “No. That’s all we wanted to say. You have a nice day. Bye.”

(I take myself out of queue and look at my supervisor.)

Supervisor: “Why would anyone drink twenty-year-old coffee?”

Me: “That’s what bothered you about that call?”

Supervisor: “What do you mean?”

Me: “She said they were just going through one of their dead friends’ homes. ‘Friends’ and ‘homes.’ Plural.”

Supervisor: “So?”

Me: “So, there haven’t been any major storms or disasters on the news. So, why do they have more than one dead friend at the same time, how did those friends die, and why are they going through their homes?”

Supervisor: “…”

Me: “Yeah. I’m taking my lunch now while you think about that.”

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