The Chosen One Is Not Always Right

, , , , , | Right | October 15, 2018

(I work at a store where, “Yes, we can,” is the policy, meaning we do whatever the customer wants, no matter how ridiculous. The following happens about thirty minutes before close.)

Customer: “White.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I need white!”

Me: “Miss, I need to know what you need that’s white, and I’ll help you find it.”

Customer: “Shirt!”

(I take her to white shirts in several departments. She doesn’t seem pleased with any of them until we get to juniors. Then, she starts actually saying more than two words.)

Customer: “My horoscope said that all I needed to do was tell someone what I needed and I’d get it. I’m glad you did, because otherwise you’d make my horoscope wrong and then I’d be doomed.”

Me: “Glad I could help.”

Customer: “I want this one! Give me this one!”

(She then thrusts the shirt she’s been looking at into my hands and looks at me expectantly.)

Me: “We can check you out right over there.”

Customer: “NO! YOU NEED TO CHECK ME OUT! MY HOROSCOPE CHOSE YOU; NOW YOU NEED TO FINISH HELPING ME!”

Me: “Miss, I’m a floor associate, and I’m not qualified to check out your purchase right now.”

Customer: “BUT YOU NEED TO! YOU’RE CHOSEN, AND YOU HAVE TO!”

(In order to get her to calm down, I had to call the manager who pulled me off of the floor and had me ring on the only open register while the regular cashier watched to ensure I didn’t mess up her drawer. The customer ended up leaving happy. This is so far one of the weirdest things I’ve had happen to me in the store.)

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