ATM Is A Hamburglar

(My best friend and I are hanging out in his dorm room up at college. It is getting late, approaching dinner time.)

Me: “Man, I’m getting hungry. I kinda don’t wanna go to the student union, though…”

Best Friend: “Yeah, me neither.”

Me: “We could go drive around and look for a good place to eat off-campus. See what’s available.”

Best Friend: “Aw, man… I’d love to, but I don’t have any cash on me right now and all I have is an ATM card. All the banks are probably closed by now.”

Me: “There’s an ATM in the lobby, though, isn’t there?”

Best Friend: “Yeah, but that’s not my bank! They charge an extra three bucks to use it if you’re not with them! That’s like, a hamburger or something! I don’t wanna waste my money…”

Me: “Yeah, OK. I get what you’re saying. Never mind that then.”

(We talk a little more, and decided that, despite wanting to get off-campus, we’ll just go to the student union after all. As we walk out of the halls and into the dorm building’s lobby, we pass by the aforementioned ATM.)

Best Friend: *pointing* “STUPID ATM! STEALIN’ ALL MY HAMBURGERS!”

(Needless to say, the girl at the front desk gave us some very strange looks as we left!)