That’s Some Real Commitment To Something Fake

Coworker: “Ugh, I’m so sleepy. I want to go home.”

Me: “But you just started an hour ago.”

Coworker: “I know, but I was out with my boyfriend until, like, 3 AM. I want to sleep.”

Me: “Well, maybe you shouldn’t be out with him until 3 AM when you know you have an 8 AM shift.”

She gets her phone out and starts playing a video from social media.

Me: “What are you doing?”

Coworker: “Watching cute videos of babies seeing and hearing for the first time through glasses and hearing aids. Their cute little faces; they always make me cry.”

She does, indeed, start to cry.

Me: “Why are you—”

The manager walks past, and my coworker immediately runs over to them, tears falling down her cheeks.

Coworker: “Oh my god, [Manager]! My mom just died! I need to leave, like, right now!”