That’s Some Grade ‘A’ Praying

(Our Catholic high school requires students to attend daily mass at least once a week during study hall. Our class was supposed to attend mass today, but our teacher has given us the option to go later in the week instead so we can study for the unusually high number of tests we have today. Only Student and I choose to get mass over with today rather than wait. We have the following conversation on our way to the chapel.)

Student: “I guess we’re the lucky ones who don’t have many tests today, huh?”

Me: “Actually, I have as many tests as the rest of them. I just recognize that no amount of studying can save me now. My best chance is to pray.”

Student: “But aren’t you an atheist?”

Me: “I’m more agnostic than anything else, but I’m also desperate. If it means a better chance at a passing grade, I’ll be the most devoted Catholic you’ve ever seen. But probably just ’till last period.”

Student: “I don’t think that’s how it works, but good luck with that.”