That’s One Dangerous Party Trick

(We are invited to a family party by my in-laws. As usual, they only remember to call on the day of the party. I work most weekend nights and am not able to attend as I have to give more than two weeks notice. I mention to a coworker that I am missing out on a party and that I wish it could have been held the next weekend when I have the Saturday night off.)

Coworker #1: “You should do what I do; you should have just called in sick and gone to the party.”

(I go to work the following Sunday. I notice that I am working with a different staff member.)

Me: “Oh, is [Coworker] sick?”

Coworker #2: “You didn’t hear what happened?”

Me: “No, is she all right?”

Coworker #2: “She got fired last night. The idiot called in sick so she could attend her boyfriend’s staff Christmas party.”

Me: “Um… Doesn’t her boyfriend work here as security?”

Coworker #2: *nods yes* “And the party was held here, and our management was invited, too.”