That’s Handy If You’ve Got Time To Kill

Every time I get a scam call, I bust out my ancient laptop that takes half an hour to even boot. I keep them on the line and talk about anything and make up fantastical stories. Once it’s booted, I have them take me step by step through everything as if I’m ninety-seven years old and have never encountered a computer before.

My record is four hours — four hours they would have otherwise spent scamming an actual elderly person.

I also got one once where we talked about metal bands, and he gave me an Indian band I’d never heard of and actually quite enjoy. I pleaded with him to stop this scam because he sounded so nice, but the call disconnected; I assume a “supervisor” stepped in.