That’s A Crappy Way To Treat A Friend

CONTENT WARNING: Animal Neglect

My friend has an elderly cat who, while sweet, doesn’t always properly groom her backside. [Cat] loves to lay on me, which is how I learn that she isn’t the best at grooming. I smell something, pick her up, and find a smear on my jeans. I immediately put her on the ground, but she jumps back up.

Me: *To my friend* “I don’t want [Cat] sitting on me. Can you put her in the bathroom or something?”

She jumps up again, and I put her on the floor.

Friend: “It’s her house. She’s not hurting anything.”

Me: “She left poop on my jeans. I don’t want her on me.”

The cat comes up. The cat goes down. I move to a different seat.

Friend: “You’re washable. She’s nineteen; she can’t help it.”

Me: “Okay, but I—” *removing the cat again* “—do not want cat poop on me. Do you have a towel or something I can lay on my lap?”

Friend: “Just move her if you’re so finicky.”

Me: “I have done that four times, and she keeps coming back. If you don’t have anything to cover my lap and you won’t put her in another room, I’m going to have to leave.”

Friend: “Seriously? She’s a cat.”

Me: “And she s*** on me.”

I put her down one last time and left. I understand that she couldn’t clean herself and she may have been upset by being isolated until I left, but I don’t think I was out of line to ask for something to protect my clothing.