That Text Book Has Finally Gone To His Head

(A particularly obnoxious boy in my sixth grade biology class sits next to me. He usually does things like steal my notebooks and pencils, or try to pull my chair out from under me during class. One day, after he stole my text book in the middle of a lecture, I have had enough, so I stand up, grab my book back, and hit him over the head with it several times while yelling at him to stop taking my stuff before sitting back down, thoroughly flustered.)

Teacher: *looking shocked* “[Boy]! Detention! One week!”

Boy: “But she’s the one that hit me! That’s not fair!”

Teacher: “Yeah, but I’ve never seen her do that before. You must have done something to deserve it! So, detention!”