Thank God He Didn’t Find Nemo

(I’m an educator at my aquarium, and I work the touch pools very frequently.)

Me: “Welcome to our tide pools! You’re welcome to reach in and touch any of the animals in these two—“

Customer: “Is this the sushi exhibit?”

Me: *clearly not amused* “No.”

Customer: *points at a skunk shrimp* “Is that a crawdad?”

Me: “He’s a skunk shrimp; he helps other animals by cleaning any—“

Customer: “Does he taste good?”

(I just glared at him until he got uncomfortable and walked away.)