Taking The Humorous High Ground

(My RA has my roommate and me together, drawing up a roommate agreement. I have a strange sense of humor, and am making it hard on the poor RA.)

RA: “So, [My Name], if you found drugs or alcohol in [Roommate]’s possessions and I wasn’t there, what would you do?”

Me: “I would wait until she came home, and then confront her about it.”

RA: “Uh-huh.”

Me: “Then I would ask her to share them with me. I don’t like buying my own because they’re expensive.”

RA: *not fully listening* “Okay, assume I’m actually there. I am at your door, knocking, and you found this stuff. What would you do?”

Me: “I can’t very well have you finding it…”

RA: “Uh-huh…”

Me: “So I would consume as much of it as possible and feed the rest to the goldfish before you banged down the door.”

RA: *finally realizing what I’ve been saying* “What…no! NO!”