I work for a tour company a little north of Yellowknife in Canada’s Northwest Territories. Most of our tourists come in the winter for the northern lights and to have a wintery experience, but we have plenty of nature and beauty to see in the middle of summer, too!

Tourist: “If we wanted to visit [region], what time would we need to start heading back to Yellowknife to be in time for the fireworks?”

Me: “Fireworks?”

Tourist: “The Fourth of July fireworks, silly! That’s tonight, right?”

Me: “Uh… no, ma’am. This is Canada.”

Tourist: “Canada is in North America! America!”

Me: “July 4^th is a US holiday, ma’am. We don’t celebrate it in Canada. Also, good luck seeing fireworks when the sun sets close to midnight.”

Tourist: “Midnight?! What!”

Me: “Is it your first day here, ma’am?”

Tourist: “We… we got in yesterday.”

Me: “And you didn’t notice the sun setting very late?”

Tourist: “I thought they were, like… practise fireworks.”

I explained a bit more, and she finally seemed to understand how far north we were, and that Canada is not the USA. I also had to explain why there wasn’t snow on the ground when it was 25°C/77°F outside.

Customer: “Are your avocadoes local?”

Manager: “This is Canada, ma’am.”

Customer: “So…?”

Manager: “No, they’re not local. We get our avocadoes from Mexico.”

Customer: “Well I want locally grown Canadian avocadoes.”

Manager: “I don’t think those are a thing, or at the very least not in the Northwest Territories.”

Customer: “Haven’t you heard that the customer is always right?”

Manager: “The laws of probability suggest the customer must be right occasionally, but I cannot personally corroborate this.”

Customer: “I’m going to go to [Competitor] where they sell locally grown avocadoes!”

They left with a smug face to go buy their mutated avocado abominations that can grow in below-freezing weather.

Related:
Avocado-No-No, Part 3
Avocado-No-No, Part 2
Avocado-No-No