Shaving Off Some Sun

, , , , , | Romantic | October 11, 2018

(My husband finishes taking his shower and comes to sit next to me on the sofa.)

Me: *snuggling* “You smell so good!”

Husband: “Yeah, I ran out of shaving cream halfway through and used sunscreen, instead.”

Me: *baffled laughter*

Don’t Have A Laughing Cow, Man

, , , , , , | | Working | May 25, 2018

(For one summer, I work at a grocery store. This store has a department where customers from small, isolated communities send us their food requests and we pick the food, bill it on a credit card, box it, and deliver it to an airline to be flown to that community. A coworker approaches me with a customer’s food list request.)

Coworker: “Hey, can you read French?”

Me: “A little bit, why?”

Coworker: “One item on this list is written in French, and the only word I understand is ‘fromage.’”

(The item in question reads, “Le fromage de la vache qui rit.”)

Me: “Hmm… the cheese… of the cow… who laughs? What?”

Coworker: “Oh! Laughing Cow Cheese!

Me: “There you go! Why on Earth was that in French?”

Coworker: “I have no idea.”