Why Oh Wyoming

, , , , | Right | March 17, 2018

(On my first day working in a video game store, I hear loud, drunken rambling outside. I go out to find an extremely irate man screaming and pointing at one of the other employee’s cars. I ask what the problem is.)

Me: “Dude. What’s the deal, man?”

Customer: “This f***** parked his car over the line!”

(The employee, who happens to be female, has parked her car — a large range rover — with one of the front tires barely over the line.)

Me: “Listen. I’m going to have to ask you to stop screaming and swearing out here, all right? This is a small town and people get scared by that kind of stuff.”

Customer: “I’m from f***ing De Moines! I’ve seen scarier s*** every f***ing morning!”

Me: “I understand that, dude, but you really don’t want to scare these people.”

Customer: “Oh, yeah? Why not?!”

(The guy starts to bump into me with his chest, pushing me against the wall. Just then, the manager walks out aiming his .44 magnum revolver that he always open-carries.)

Manager: “Because everybody in Wyoming has one of these, and you don’t want to scare somebody with one of these.”

(The manager pulls the hammer back.)

Manager: “Right now, you’re scaring me.”

(The customer stared in horror down the barrel of the gun and swiftly got in his car and drove off.)

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Unfiltered Story #104339

| Unfiltered | January 23, 2018

(I work at a popular game store and I know a ton about Xbox games, mainly Mass Effect. My manager is in the back and a customer walks in and grabs a game off the shelf. it should be noted that I am female and have a Mass Effect T-shirt on and I’m wearing Renegade earrings)

Customer: (has his game and is waiting at the other, empty register)
Me: I can check you out here, sir. My manager is in the back on a phone call.
Customer: I want HIM to check me out, not some dumb girl! I’ve been waiting for this game for weeks!
Me: well, this “dumb girl” can get you out of here in two minutes, whereas my manager won’t be back for another 20.
Customer: FINE (throws the game on the counter)
Customer: (as I’m ringing him up) I don’t see why they hire GIRLS here, they don’t play video games! Video games are for men! Why hire someone who doesn’t know anything about the games? I’m sure you just wear that shirt so you can look cool and try to fit in. (rambles on and on about how video games are “just for guys” and how girls “ruin” them)
Me: (bags up his game) I hope you enjoy it sir!
Customer: Whatever, you’ve probably never even played it.
Me: (as I hand it to him, smiling) By the way, ***** dies on Tuchanka.
Customer: (face fumes red and he storms out of the store)
Me: Have a nice day!
Customer: F*** YOU
(Best part, my manager laughed and spoiled the same customers next game too for being rude to another female employee)

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Unfiltered Story #102278

, , | Unfiltered | January 1, 2018

(One Thanksgiving, the Pastor from a local church came in looking for a discount on turkeys.)

Me: “How may I help you?

Pastor: “I need [amount of turkeys], can I get a discount?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we can not give discounts as we are the cheapest price in town this year.”

Pastor: “Well! That’s not very d*** Christian of you!”


It’s Barely Cute When A Child Does It…

, , , , , | Romantic | December 19, 2017

(I’m standing in line when I notice the bottle of tea I’m holding has leaked all over my shoes and the floor. I let out a little cry of shock and head back to the cooler to replace it. When I get back up front, the guy who was standing behind me in line is checking out.)

Guy: *turns around* “Haha, I beat you!”

(I just stare at him incredulously.)

Guy: “So, how you doin’?”

(My eyebrows couldn’t possibly go higher.)

Guy: “Just not going to say anything, huh?”

Me: “‘Haha, I beat you.’? Are you five years old?”

Guy: *goes a little red* “No! Just, I know you were up here… but then I… I got to the counter first.”

Me: “Yup. Congratulations.”

Guy:  “And, uh… You’re pretty. So, I’m hoping I could get your number.”

Me: “Wow, seriously? No. If you want a woman’s number, try acting like a man instead of a child.”

(He left in a hurry.)

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“Cut-Out” The Dressing Part

, , , | Right | December 4, 2017

(My husband and I own one of those photography studios where people dress up in “wild west” costumes and get a sepia-toned picture taken. We have examples of the pictures all over the walls, so people can get ideas as to how they want to dress. One day an older couple walks in.)

Customer: “How long does it take to get a photo done?”

Me: “For two people? I can have you in and out with your print in about fifteen minutes.”

Customer: “Just fifteen minutes? We have a trolley to catch.”

Me: “You mean the city trolley that leaves at [time]? This only takes fifteen minutes, so you’ll be out in time to catch your trolley, no problem.”

Customer: “Oh, good! How do we start?”

Me: “You just have to decide how you want to dress!”

Customer: *just now noticing the wall covered in photos* “You mean we dress up?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “We don’t just put our head in a cut-out?”

Me: *a little taken aback, as older customers usually know exactly what this kind of thing is* “…yes.”

Customer: “Oh, we don’t have time for that.”

Me: “But it only would take fifteen minutes.”

Customer: “I’m sorry; we just don’t have time. Bye!”

(Apparently not all “fifteen minutes” are created equal.)

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