Bread Thieves Are The Ones To Sue YOU

, , , , | Right | December 3, 2018

(I am on my second shift at a popular bakery and am just beginning to handle customers by myself. A woman walks in with two children:)

Me: “Hi! How are you?”

Customer: *ignoring me* “I’ll have three white loaves, sliced, two coffee scrolls, three Mediterranean pizzas, a croissant, a custard scroll, and six dinner rolls.”

Me: *totally overwhelmed* “How would you like the loaves sliced, ma’am? Thin or thick?”

Customer: *looking at me incuriously* “Does it look like it matters?”

(I slice them thick because most people choose this option.)

Me: “Sorry, that was three Mediterranean pizzas and a croissant?”

Customer: “Yes! And two coffee scrolls, a custard scroll, and six dinner rolls!”

Me: *after processing this huge order* “That comes to $36.50.”

Customer: “What!? That isn’t right! I came in last month and got the same for $20!”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, the loaves and rolls combo promotion ended last week.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous!” *grabs bag of bread and tries to stalk out of the store*

Me: “Ma’am, you haven’t paid for that bread!”

(As she tries to leave the bakery via the sliding glass doors, she quite literally walks into the door, pretty hard, too.)

Customer: “I’M SUING FOR THIS!”

(The other customers and I were trying not to laugh. We did get sued a small amount for the door incident but it was totally worth it to see her fall over!)

You Don’t Have The Power To Shut Us Down

, , , , | Legal | November 29, 2018

I work in a convenience store. The laws in my state basically cut off all sales of alcohol at 2:00 am. A drunk man comes in at 2:10 and gets angry when he cannot buy beer. He throws a fit and I kick him out.

He comes back about an hour later and parks his car near the edge of the lot, but he doesn’t come inside. I see him get out of his car and go storming out of sight around the corner of the building, with something long in his hands — too distant to see it clearly. This freaks me out, naturally.

The phone is in my hand to call the police, when suddenly the whole store goes dark. I sprint to the front door and lock it while telling the dispatcher what’s going on.

A police officer comes inside to stay with me while two others go around back. Over the cop’s radio, we both hear a request put in for an ambulance.

They find him knocked out behind the store, and a camping hatchet — the non-insulated metal kind — buried in the severed power conduit. One shoe was blown completely off and is sitting, alone, a few feet from his unconscious body. Melted a hole right through it. Somehow, he gets off with only a few burns, rather than a medium-to-well-done cooked heart.

We get to listen to cops trying to figure out whether or not they will need to shut down the power to the area to get the hatchet out, because with evidence sitting right in front of them, they are not going to touch that thing to bring it into evidence until they know it is safe.

The owner has to shut the store down for a full day to have the power cable repaired.

Failing To Get A Good Deal As They Only Trade In Insults

, , , , , | Right | November 29, 2018

(I work in a retro and modern video games store that sells used consoles and games. Per policy, we don’t typically give cash refunds unless the item is faulty and we can’t get it fixed, but only within two weeks of purchase. Alternately, if it still works, it can be traded in for in-store credit. This information is printed on the receipt.)

Customer: “I’d like to return this game, please.” *slams down game case*

Me: *picking up the case* “Okay, what’s the issue with it?”

Customer: “I changed my mind.”

Me: “Well, we don’t give cash refunds for items due to changing your mind, but I can offer you an in-store credit of [amount], if you have your receipt.” *about to open the case to check the disc*

Customer: “No, I want a refund; it doesn’t work!” *slides a crumpled receipt towards me*

(I realise I’m dealing with a difficult customer.)

Me: *I pick up the receipt and notice it is for a sale about six months ago* “I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I can’t offer you a refund or credit, because you bought it six months ago.”

(I start to close up the case and hand it back to her, explaining that if she wants, she can sell it to us for a reduced amount of either cash or credit, if it works, but that we cannot accept a refund.)


(My assistant manager steps in at this point, as he can see I’m getting stressed out.)

Assistant Manager: “Do you know what the police will do when they get here? Nothing.”

Customer: *still yelling* “YOU’RE NOTHING!”

(She snatched the case and receipt from my hands, only to chuck them towards my face and leave. It took a few minutes, but eventually we both found it funny that she thought the police would do anything about it, and she left the game behind, anyway, so she got nothing out of it!)

Jesus Promised Eternal Life And Free Tacos

, , , , | Right | November 25, 2018

(I am a shift manager at a fast food restaurant. A new assistant store manager has just joined our team from another store, and it’s her first day here.)

Customer: “Any chance I can get some free tacos?”

Assistant: “Sorry, I can’t give away free food. I could be fired.”

Customer: “What?! You can’t give me two tacos?”

(This goes on, with the assistant manager reiterating that she can’t give away food, and the customer insisting she should.)

Customer: “You know what? Fine!” *throws a sign across the counter*

Me: “Hey! You need to leave now!”

Customer: “Jesus would have given me free tacos!”

(He then picks up the register and throw it towards me. Luckily, it’s still plugged in and doesn’t go far. He then storms out. For the rest of the day we have to take front-counter orders on the drive-thru register.)

Me: *to the assistant manager* “So… welcome to your new store!”

Pervert’s Ideas Are The Fault Of The Victims, Apparently

, , , , , | Right | November 23, 2018

I am working on putting small freight items away whilst running the register. I have fairly long hair, and to keep it from getting caught in fixtures around the store, I wear it back in a braided ponytail. As I’m picking up several boxes to put away, an elderly gentleman grabs me by the hair and proceeds to exclaim, “Look at the mane on this one!”

I have my hands full, so I can’t grab my hair back, and being shocked at his behavior, I’m scared into stillness. My coworker gets him to let go.

I walk as quickly as I can to put the items in my arms away and hide in that corner of the department until the guy leaves. I return to the register where my coworker tells me that the customer said to her, “She really shouldn’t keep her hair long like that; it gives perverts ideas.”

I just stare at her in disbelief. To this day, I have avoided that customer.

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