When The Waitress Gives You Lemons…

, , , , | Working | May 17, 2020

A waitress has come over with our drinks.

Me: “Sorry, but could I have my Coke without a lemon, please?”

Waitress: “Oh, my. I wonder how that got in there!”

She disappears and returns a minute later. This time it isn’t just a lemon slice in the glass; it is an entire half of a lemon. I’m about to ask, but she scurries away. 

Me: *Shouting* “Excuse me, but I said I didn’t want lemon.”

Waitress: “EVERYONE HAS LEMON! IT’S BETTER!”

She threw her tray at me and ran into the kitchen. Thankfully, the tray missed, but the owner wasn’t too impressed with her behaviour and fired her on the spot.

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Family Paints A Bad Picture Of Itself

, , , , , , | Right | May 12, 2020

I paint faces at a theme park geared toward younger children. It’s 100+ degrees outside and I brought a drink in with me so that I could have a cup to drink water from our stand cooler.

A woman with three children comes up to the stand. One child is in a stroller while the other two, a boy and a girl, are following behind her. The girl is wearing a button from a prominent children’s group stating that she’s from New Jersey.

Me: “Hello! What can I do for you today?”

The customer points at a button on her daughter’s shirt.

Customer: “Does she get a discount for this?”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t, but I can make your face paint extra special.”

The customer acts a bit offended but gets her daughter in the chair, and I do a free upgrade on the design. As soon as I’m done, she places her son in the chair and proceeds to let the girl run around and trash my stand while I paint his face. I say nothing but get the paint done rather quickly. The boy jumps down and joins his sister in messing up the stand.

Me: “Okay, ma’am, is there anything else I can do for you?”

Customer: *Sounding agitated* “How much do I owe you?”

I ring her up and give her the total. As I’m handing her the change, she screams.

Customer: “OH, MY GOD! THAT IS DISGUSTING! WHO’S IS THAT?!”

I look to see that her son has gotten into the storage area for our personal items, taken out my drink, and finished half of it.

Me: *Calmly* “Um, that’s actually mine.”

The customer turns an angry glare on me.

Customer: “It’s yours? Too bad.”

Me: “Ma’am, that was the only way for me to get any water today.”

Customer: “Oh, well. Come on kids!”

She grabbed her children and pushed the stroller away, leaving me to clean up the mess left by her children… including throwing away my half-consumed drink.

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Aren’t Manicures Supposed To Be Relaxing?

, , , , | Working | May 9, 2020

My sister and I are about to go on holiday to Thailand and we go to a local salon to get our nails done. We were told about this place because it does some amazing nail designs. But the owner gets my sister’s nails all wrong.

Sister: *To me* “They look wrong.”

The nails are all wonky, some shorter than the others.

Sister: “Excuse me, can you tidy them up?”

The owner makes them worse. She asks a few more times, but they stay wonky.

Me: “We’re going somewhere else. My sister shouldn’t have to pay for a bad job.”

To our surprise, the owner gets cross and grabs my sister by the arms.

Owner: “No, I’ve done a beautiful job!”

My sister tries to fight herself away, sending bottles everywhere. The owner lets go and stands in front of the door, the only exit, locking us and two other young customers inside.

Owner: “You must pay!”

Sister: “Let us go!”

Owner: “No, you pay!”

We are now scared. He rummages behind the counter. One of the other customers asks to be let go. To our horror, the owner lets her go, but locks the door behind them!

Me: *Yelling* “I’m not having this!”

I see a long black case on the floor, and my sister and I bang it against the window.

Owner: “Pay now, pay now!”

I lunge for the door, but he fights me, pushing me hard. I fall onto the sofa, see my handbag, and grab my phone. I call the police.

Me: “Help, my sister and I are being held hostage in [Nail Salon]!”

To my surprise, the owner stopped being so vicious and let the police in when they arrived. He was only fined. But there’s no way we’re going back to that store.

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Stinky Steve

, , , , , | Right | April 29, 2020

It is around 10:00 pm on a Friday night. I am the shift lead and we are winding down to our closing time at 11:00 pm. One of my coworkers finished work shortly before and stayed around in the lobby to chat with friends. He goes to the toilet and comes back seconds later asking me to come with him to the disabled toilets. Our disabled toilet has a sliding door that is open, and you can see in when it isn’t in use.

Upon arriving at the toilet, I see that someone has written the name “Steve” in foot-high letters across the wall in excrement and left their “pen” in the sink. Having dealt with numerous rectal catastrophes over the years, the stink doesn’t quite knock me sick, but the sheer sight of it destroys me as a person.

My staff member politely declines the offer to give me a hand with it, so I clean it myself. I go and watch the CCTV footage afterward and can only narrow down the culprit to about a dozen people.

I never did find out who “Steve” was but he was the one who finished me off. I handed my notice in the next day, which contained possibly the only ever use of “a*** graffiti” in an official document, and had a couple of weeks to myself before settling on haulage as a next direction for myself.

I very much enjoy my new life which is devoid of fecal horrors and the other joys of the fast food industry.

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Alcohol Strips You Of Agency

, , , , , , , | Right | April 29, 2020

I work as a dishwasher at a restaurant in town. Toward the end of the night, one of my coworkers was cleaning the stoves. The stoves were still hot and the second he poured water on them, the amount of steam that came off of them was enough to set off the sprinklers above them as well as the fire alarm.

A few minutes later, the fire department showed up — two firemen in all their gear, and one in a regular uniform.

During this whole situation, there was a group celebrating a woman’s birthday party. Everyone in the group was severely drunk; that being said, when the firemen were trying to come into the restaurant, somebody in the group thought the firemen were male strippers. The group became loud and excited, chanting, “Strippers! Strippers! Strippers!”

One of the women in the group forced herself onto one of the firemen and a police officer on scene had to break it up.

Fortunately for the group, nobody was arrested.

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