Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

How Cows Order Coffee

, , , | Right | January 25, 2008

Me: “Good morning, how can I help you?”

Woman: “Yeah, a small coffee with two splendas and extra milk.”

Me: “Okay, that will be $1.49.”

(She pays and I give her the change. I proceed to make the drink. I pressed the “Medium” button for milk and then gave an extra shot. When I gave it to her, she took a sip and made a face as if she had just taken a sip of liquefied dog s**t.)

Me: “What seems to be the problem?”

Woman: “I asked for extra milk! This is too strong.”

Me: “Well, I’ll put some more in for you. No problem.”

Woman: *muttering under her breath* “Idiot kid…”

(I put another “Medium” shot in. This is two mediums and one extra shot for a total of seven milks. She takes another sip, with the same face.)

Woman: “What part of extra milk do you not understand?”

Me: “I understand what extra milk means. I put in about four times the regular amount of milk.”

Woman: “Well, put more!”

(I put in more. I put a “Large” shot of milk (four more). This brings our total to eleven milks, therefore being classified as milk with a little coffee.)

Me: “Here.”

(She takes another sip, and yes. Again, she makes that freaking face.)

Woman: “Look. Extra milk means you put in the regular amount, and then you put in MORE.”

Me: “I know that! That is a SMALL coffee with ELEVEN MILKS!”

Woman: “PUT IN MORE!”

(I put in more another “Medium” shot (three more)).

Me: “Here. The coffee is almost white now.”

(She drinks it again and SPITS IT ALL OVER THE COUNTER.)

Me: “Lady, what’s your problem?”

Woman: “This coffee is cold! I ordered a hot coffee, not a cold coffee! Can you comprehend that?”

Me: “F*** this. Who’s next?”

(My shift leader was laughing in the corner the whole time. She remade this lady’s drink with one large shot of milk and gave it to her. She sipped it…”Ah, now that’s better!”)

(Everyone in line had a pretty good laugh about it.)


Did you find this story using our World Milk Day roundup?

Click here to get to the next story!

Click here to get back to the roundup!

1 Thumbs
5,321

Barking Up The Wrong Tree

, , | Right | January 14, 2008

Me: “Good afternoon, AV Services, how can I help you?”

Very Angry Caller: “Yeah, I just flew in on Flight [Number] from Cleveland, and you lost my luggage.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you have the wrong number. This is the [University].”

Very Angry Caller: “No it’s not! You’re just saying that!”

Me: “No, really, sir. Our phone number is very close to the airport’s number.”

Very Angry Caller: “LISTEN! YOU LOST MY D*** LUGGAGE! YOU NEED TO FIND IT!”

Me: “Sir, I don’t have your luggage.”

Very Angry Caller: “STOP F****** LYING! I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR!”

Me: “I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have your luggage either. We could probably get you a DVD player or a slide projector.”

(Very Angry Caller starts cussing randomly. I hang up.)

1 Thumbs
1,845

Insatiable

, | Right | January 12, 2008

Me: “One tall cappuccino!”

Customer: *picks up drink, opens lid and looks inside* “Excuse me. There’s a lot of room in here. The top is nothing but foam.”

Me: “Yes, that’s what a cappuccino is. It’s basically the same thing as a latte but with more foam.”

Customer: “I don’t get you guys. You guys make me think I’m buying more by calling a small drink a tall, and now you just fill my drink up with foam.”

Me: “I’m sorry. If you’d like, I could just get you a latte.”

Customer: “No, that’s alright but I will take a passion tea lemonade.”

(I do her order and she comes back.)

Customer: “WHY IS THERE SO MUCH ICE?! F*** YOU GUYS AND YOUR RIP OFF DRINKS!”

(Customer storms off with the drink and chucks it at the window outside.)

1 Thumbs
1,512

Please Let These Questions Be Rhetorical

, , , | Right | January 9, 2008

Customer: “Why don’t you have any more?!”

Me: “…because everyone else bought them all.”

Customer: “BUT WHY?!”

Me: “I don’t know… maybe for the same reason you want to buy them?”

Customer: “And what reason is that?!”

1 Thumbs
1,900

Kill Them With Kindness

, | Right | December 27, 2007

Me: “Thank you for calling [Tech Support]. How can I help?”

Customer: *very irate* “Yeah! I didn’t pay my Internet bill and now it’s saying my account is suspended and I want to know why!”

Me: “Okay, you didn’t pay your bill, we suspended your account, and you would like to know why?”

Customer: “Yes! Why? Why did you suspend it?”

Me: “All right, let me take a look here… My system shows it suspended the account because you didn’t pay the last bill we sent.”

Customer: “I know I didn’t pay the bill! Have a little f****** sympathy here! Are you customer service?”

Me: “I’m tech support.”

Customer: “Where is customer service at?!”

Me: “Our billing department handles all our customer service issues. I’ll transfer you down to them.”

Customer: “You’re acting like a real a**hole; you know that? You need to have more empathy for people!”

Me: *in the most uppity happy-go-lucky voice ever conceived; I almost gagged from bringing so much joy up* “You have yourself a fabulously sunshine-filled day, sir!”

Customer: “WHAT’S YOUR F****** NA–” *click*

(Gotta love that transfer button…)

1 Thumbs
5,340