I am on a packed flight. The plane is quite small, with two rows of three seats and a single aisle in the middle.
Shortly after takeoff, a mother releases her toddler (a boy no older than three) into the aisle, and he proceeds to zoom up and down it as fast as his little legs can carry him. Once would be fine, as the little guy probably needs to stretch his legs, but he carries on zooming up and down the plane.
Over, and over, and over again. He starts screaming and squealing as he does.
It comes to a head when he runs straight into the food and beverage cart that the air stewards have started to use.
Air Steward: “Hey there, little guy. Maybe go and sit down with Mommy now?”
The boy, having the time of his life, obviously completely ignores the air steward and turns around to start another sprint to the front of the plane. He charges back toward the back and this time slams himself into the air steward.
Air Steward: “Okay, that’s enough, little guy. Let me take you to your seat now.”
The little boy doesn’t know where he’s seated, so the steward takes his hand and asks aloud:
Air Steward: “Can a parent of this young passenger please make themselves known?”
Nothing.
The steward checks with the head steward, and they identify a woman reading a magazine as the mother.
Head Steward: “Ma’am, your son is running up and down the aisle and disrupting our operations, as well as causing a disturbance to other passengers. Please keep him occupied in his seat for as much of the flight as possible.”
Mother: *Not even looking up from her magazine* “He’s fine. He’s just burning off some energy.”
Head Steward: “Ma’am, with all respect, it is not fine. I need you to keep him occupied in his seat for the rest of the flight.”
Mother: “He’s just running up and down the runway! I don’t see what the big deal is!”
Head Steward: “Because, ma’am, the runway is what the plane uses to land and take off. It is not the strip in the middle of the plane that your son can use as his own private racetrack.”
The mother actually looks up for once to see two stewards glaring at her, one of them holding the hand of her son, who is getting ever more fussy.
Mother: “Why do you have my son? Let him go! What do you think you’re doing?! You’re hurting him!”
Head Steward: “Actually, ensuring that he stays in his seat with his seatbelt fastened is doing the opposite of hurting him.”
The mother tuts loudly but manages to bribe her son to his seat with some chocolate.
The chocolate bar is scarfed up in roughly half a second (maybe an exaggeration, but it was quick!) and he’s back to his “zoomies” in no time. The mother seems to be so engrossed in her horoscope that she’s ignoring her son’s antics again.
The head steward heads toward the front of the plane, and a few minutes later she’s escorting the little guy back to his seat… again.
Head Steward: “Ma’am. Ma’am! Please pay attention. Your son is to remain in his seat with his seat belt fastened for the rest of the flight.”
Mother: “The seat belt light isn’t on!”
As if on cue, the seat belt lights for the entire plane all activate, and there’s a “ping” on the speakers before we all hear the captain’s voice.
Captain: “I’m keeping the seatbelt sign on for the remainder of the flight. Passengers are only allowed out of their seats to use the restrooms. For those who wish to complain about my actions, please mention in said complaints that some customers were unwilling to control their children until it became technically illegal not to do so. I wish most of you a pleasant remainder of the flight.”
That little boy was forced to sit in his seat and gave his mother nothing but tantrums for the next three hours. The rest of the plane endured it, but it was nice to see the mother forced to parent for a little while!
