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If Only You Could Hear Yourself

| Related | April 11, 2014

(Several family members in my brother-in-law’s family are deaf. They have an interpreter at the wedding and a ‘deaf table’ at the reception for those that are comfortable signing.)

Me: “So, [Brother-In-Law], the interpreter – can she hear?”

Brother-In-Law: “Can she hear?”

Me: “Yes, can she—” *face palms* “I’m never going to live this down, am I?”

Brother-In-Law: “Never!”

Hasn’t A Prayer Of Keeping Quiet

, | Related | February 20, 2014

(I am five years old. My aunt is getting married. My grandma wears the exact same Chignon hairstyle every day, but for this occasion, she goes to a hairstylist and gets a very ‘80s up-do. We are all in church, and during the wedding ceremony there is a minute of silent prayer.)

Me: *loudly* “Mom, why does Grandma look so weird today?”

Mom: “Shhh!”

Me: “What? I waited till all the grown-ups stopped talking.”

(My aunt, the bride, cracked up laughing and could not stop for ten minutes.)

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Truly Hiding In Books

| Romantic | November 8, 2013

(I started talking to my now-fiancé in college because he asked to borrow books from me, and then wanted to discuss them with me. Eight years later, we are getting married.)

Me: “I’m kind of worn out talking to all these people.”

Fiancé: “But it’s our wedding! They came to celebrate with us; we have to talk to them.”

Me: “But I’m tired! There are so many people!”

Fiancé: “You know… we did bring our books…”

Me: *kissing him* “Hi, will you marry me?”

Fiancé: “I thought that’s what I just did!”

(We spent half an hour hiding in a back room of the church, reading our books together at our own wedding!)

This story is part of the Wedding roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

23 Crazy Stories About Mothers-In-Law, And The Interesting Relationships We Have With Them


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Stress About The Dress

, , , , , , | Right | October 21, 2013

(I’m an overweight woman who has always struggled with weight due to a non-functioning thyroid. I struggle to find a store that caters to larger brides until I find this one, so I go to see what they have. There’s a large woman (probably about 5’5 and 350-380 pounds) on the stage in the center of the room having a fitting done. I’m browsing the catalogs when I hear an exchange between a daughter and her mother and the manager. The daughter is a thin girl who appears spoiled with how she talks. The daughter is staring at the larger woman on the stage, and leans in to her mother.)

Daughter: “I can’t believe someone like her is actually getting married!”

Mother: “I didn’t think whales mated for life!”

(The bride-to-be has clearly heard the comments and is looking devastated. She takes a step away from the manager who is doing the fitting, but the manager stops her and walks up to the mother and daughter.)

Manager: “I can’t believe you think you’re going to get a dress from my store.”

Daughter: “Well, joke’s on you, then, because I’m actually here to pick it up! Besides, I’ve already paid.”

Manager: “Oh, you’re picking up your order? What’s the name?”

Mother: “It’s [Name].”

Manager: “All right…”

(The manager goes behind the counter, taps some things on the register, and then hands a receipt.)

Manager: “I need you to sign this.”

Mother: “What’s this?”

(The mother signs anyway.)

Manager: “That’s you signing that you have accepted a full refund for your purchase. You can find another store to get your dresses at. I just cancelled your order and am refusing you service. Now leave before I call the police.”


(The daughter starts throwing things around.)

Mother: “We had those dresses custom-made! How could you cancel her order?! Look at her!”

Manager: “I cancelled the order because I am not going to let any bride feel like she’s not worthy of marriage just because of her size. Clearly, you both feel that you are better than others, and I have no place for clients that are, frankly, a**-holes. I’m calling the police, and since I still have your card information, I’m going to charge you for whatever damages your daughter causes.”

(The manager picked up the phone. The mother grabbed her daughter and they rushed out of the door. I ended up buying my dress from them, and it was BEAUTIFUL! Turned out the manager had a daughter who had a severe thyroid disease and had struggled with weight as well!)

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Not As Good As He Once Was

| Romantic | August 31, 2013

(I take my boyfriend to my friend’s wedding. He hardly knows anyone there, but is still very social with everyone. After a great night, we are walking out.)

Me: “I can take you anywhere.” *starts singing* “I can’t take you anywhere!”

Boyfriend: “What’s that?”

Me: “‘I can’t take you anywhere.’ It’s a Toby Keith song.”

Boyfriend: “That’s a place you can’t take me: a Toby Keith concert.”