Leaves Mushroom For Error

, , , , | Right | September 23, 2017

Me: “Thank you for calling [Pizza Place], how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I just came into your store and picked up my pizza, and there were no mushrooms on it! Can you help me?”

Me: “Whoops! Sorry about that. Let me go ahead and take a look at your order and see what I can do. May I have your name, please?”

(She gives me her name and I look up her order. She placed her order online and therefore did not speak with any employee about it. The order was for a specialty cheese pizza without any extra toppings whatsoever.)

Me: “Hmm, it looks like you placed your order online without mushrooms, ma’am. Luckily—”

Customer: *interrupting* “What? Well, if that’s how you treat your customers, then I’m never ordering pizza from here again!” *hangs up*

(How she thought we were psychically supposed to know she wanted mushrooms on her pizza is beyond me. I was going to mention that at least she wasn’t charged for any extra toppings, but oh well!)

A Weird Beard Exchange

, , , , , , | Friendly | September 22, 2017

I regularly played guitar on Sunday mornings with the music team at my church, and had for many years at the time of this story.

This particular Sunday was during a period where I was in between jobs, and I had let my beard grow out for a couple months due to laziness, and a little curiosity.

An old lady that I recognized, but had never talked to before, came up to me after service. “Excuse me,” she said, “I was looking at you during worship today, and I was just thinking that you used to be such an attractive young man. I just wish you’d take better care of yourself.”

To this day, that has been the only exchange between that woman and me.

Unfiltered Story #94368

, , | Unfiltered | September 20, 2017

(Every once in a while, my wife and I take the kids to a popular self-serve frozen yogurt place where there’s a whole wall of flavor selections and a huge bar of topping choices, and you pay for your creation by weight. Due to the ages of our children, we have to help them get their treats, and you can handle one, maybe two, cups at a time. So we’re strategic about it, she and I going up one at a time to each help one kid and get our own. We learned early on by visiting this place that they’ve set up their system to accommodate such arrangements without requiring multiple purchases: they weigh each cup, then store the weight/cost, then we add to it as needed until we’re ready to pay. We’ve done this so often and it’s always been so smooth that we don’t even specify specifically what we’re doing to the cashier, we just say, “and we’re going to be adding to this order” and continue concocting.)

(Well, on this particular visit, prompted by an email telling my wife that a $2 off promotion she had been awarded was expiring soon, we were the only customers when we first arrived. Not long after my wife started helping our oldest with their treat, a small rush hit and about 10-12 people showed up and got in line. At the cash register, as normal, my wife told the cashier, “we’ll be getting more with this order,” and sent our oldest over to me and went back through alone to get hers. A couple minutes later as I was talking with my kids at the table, I looked up to see how far along my wife was and I saw the cashier angrily staring a hole through the back of my wife’s head, making the circular hand motion of “come on, already!” and about six people were standing at the register looking confused and a little annoyed. My wife (oblivious to all this) finished her treat and went to the back of the line of people at the register.)

Cashier: “Ma’am!” *gesturing her forward*

Wife: “Oh! Uh . . . okay.” *as her yogurt is weighed* “My husband is going through, too, so there’s still more on this.”

Cashier: *really annoyed now, sneering at my wife, then turning to the still-growing line of people* “I’m sorry but it’s going to be just a LITTLE longer . . .”

Me: *catching on, stepping up to the register* “Aren’t you able to store her order and help other people while we get the rest of our stuff?”

(The cashier looks very confused, looks over her monitor, and then as if by providence a second employee comes out from the back to help with the growing line of customers. She and the first cashier whisper for a moment, and the second cashier smiles, makes a few selections on the screen, and then helps the next people in line while the first cashier doesn’t acknowledge my wife again but also starts helping the next people in line.)

(After I have my stuff, it’s time to pay and I’m again dealing with the first cashier. I mention the $2 promotion as I’m getting ready to pay. The cashier gets our phone number to apply the promotion and fumbles on the screen for a second.)

Cashier: “Hmm. Well it was there but then it vanished. I guess it expired already. Your total is $X.XX.”

Me: “Well we’re here because we were told it was expiring at the end of the day.” (It was still hours from closing time).

Cashier: “Yeah, so it expired today. It’s expired. Your total is $X.XX.”

(I see I’m getting nowhere so I pay and then tell my wife when I sit down. She checks her email again and it was sent *that morning* and said “visit us today” to use it. We got home and emailed corporate about the entire experience, and within 24 hours had an apology, assurance that the manager of the branch would be notified, and a $5 coupon. We’ve been back a couple times and haven’t seen her again).

It’s Rude To Feud

, , , | Right | September 18, 2017

(A customer comes up to the counter with two young children.)

Me: “Hi there. What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Two tickets to [Popular Movie] and two small freezes.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but our machine isn’t working today. Would you like to substitute for a soft drink?”

Customer: *to his children, his tone suddenly shifting from polite to rude* “Throw things at her until the machine is fixed.”

Manager: *comes over to stand beside me, towering over both me and the customer, clearly having overheard what he said* “Hello, sir. Is there an issue over here?”

Customer: *clearly rattled* “Nope. None at all. I’ll take two small [sodas], ma’am.”

(I considered myself very lucky to have such a great manager, who looked out for us instead of bending over backwards for unreasonable people just to keep himself golden in the eyes of corporate.)

Open-Minded About Being Closed

, , , , | Right | September 15, 2017

(I work at a store that stays open until 10 pm each night. On this day, it’s around 9:58 pm, my manager and I are the only ones still in the store, we’ve cleaned up, and we are walking to lock the front door, keys in hand, when a car pulls into a space outside and an entire family gets out and runs up to the door.)

Father: “Wait! Wait! Are you still open?”

(I look at my manager who, to my annoyance, just shrugs.)

Manager: “Technically, yes, we are.”

Father: “Great! We only need a few things!”

(Unable to do anything now, we let them in and watch as their kids begin destroying the aisles we have just organized while the parents take their time grabbing things and tossing them into a hand basket. Some time later, they come up to the register, which my manager has reopened for them. I’m bagging.)

Father: “So, when do you guys normally close?”

Manager: “We actually are closed now.”

Father: “What!? That’s impossible! You said you weren’t closed when we came in!”

Manager: “That’s because you came in just before 10 pm, when we do close.”

(The father gives us both a blank look.)

Manager: “You’ve been in here for almost 30 minutes.”

(More blank looks.)

Mother: “Honey, time doesn’t stop while you’re in here.”

(Another moment passes as the father looks at his wife, the clock on his phone, then at the manager in shocked silence.)

Father: “Well… why didn’t you say that before we came in? If I’d known that, we’d have gone to a different store!”

(He grumbles as we ring up his purchases and his wife corrals their kids, getting in a final jab as they leave.)

Father: “Next time just tell us to go elsewhere!”

Manager: “…but I was trying to AVOID that very argument!”

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