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Add That To The List Of Companies To Avoid

, , , , , , | Working | August 11, 2021

My phone rings, and I don’t recognize the number. But I did leave a message for my doctor earlier, so it could be the doctor or her nurse calling back, so I answer.

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “Hi, [My Name], how are you today?”

Me: “Who’s calling?”

Caller: “I’m calling about renewable energy. Have you given any thought to this topic given everything that’s going on in the world?”

Me: “How did you get this number?”

Caller: “From the Homeowners List.”

Not from an HOA, which isn’t relevant to my area anyway, just some Homeowners List.

Me: “I see. You can take me off your list.”

Caller: *Annoyed* “Okay, sure, KAREN.” *Click*

The thing is, my name sounds like Karen. I’m not actually sure if she said Karen accidentally or was trying to insult me for not wanting unsolicited phone calls. Strange!

Throwing The Sexism Book At Them

, , , , , | Working | August 6, 2021

I’ve been told that I’m pretty; my hair is curly and red and I wear makeup and know a bit about how to wear clothes that flatter me. I’m craving some new reading material, so I go into a bookstore with the intent of finding a good fantasy. As soon as I arrive, the male clerk follows me with his eyes. I find the cookbook section, and, remembering that I still need a birthday present for my friend, I start looking through them, trying to find one that she’ll like. Someone taps on my shoulder. It’s the male clerk from before.

Clerk: “Can I help you find anything?” *Smiles*

Me: “Yeah, do you have any fantasy novels?”

His eyes go wide and he leads me to another part of the store… to books with titles like “Fifty Shades Of Grey” and “Broken Heart.”

Me: “Not these! I meant like vampires, werewolves, ghosts—”

Clerk: “Oh, really? I thought you meant this section. I mean, dressed the way you are.”

Me: “Excuse me? That’s really sexist.”

Clerk: “I’m not being sexist. I’m just saying, you’re really beautiful. I would like to go out with you.”

Me: “Wow. Um, no, sorry. I have to go.”

Then, I realize that he’s cornered me, and I can’t get around him without him being able to grab me. Then, a man comes out of a back room and I give him a pleading look. He walks up and taps the male clerk on the shoulder.

Man: “[Clerk], I need you to go shelve those Stephen Kings.”

Clerk: “Hang on, I’m helping this girl.”

Man: “Do it, now.”

Thankfully, the male clerk goes to the back. 

Me: “Are you the manager?”

Man: “Yes. Was he bothering you?”

I told him what had happened, and he shook his head and promised to write him up for harassment. I put the cookbook back and haven’t gone into that shop again. Now I buy all my books online.

Look Again, Deer

, , , , | Romantic | August 2, 2021

I am driving on the interstate with my wife when the cars in front of us slam to a halt.

Me: “What’s going on? Oh, there’s a deer in the road.”

Wife: “There were three. What’s that? It looks like someone hit a deer. Oh, never mind; it’s just a person. Wait, that would be worse.”

Thankfully, my wife was wrong. It was just some garbage on the shoulder, and I got a laugh of relief.

It Sounds Like They’ve Had One Too Many Already

, , , , | Right | July 30, 2021

It’s another busy day at the grocery store, with lots of people in and out getting their shopping done for the week. I’m checking people out at a regular pace, but we’re still encouraged to answer the phone when we can, so when the phone rings between customers, I pick it up.

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Um, yeah, hi. So, I bought some champagne, but I don’t think it made it into my bag. It wasn’t there when I got home.”

This happens occasionally; if it’s busy, maybe an item gets set aside and doesn’t get bagged, or a customer leaves a bag of groceries on the bagging counter, etc. If it does, we make a note in a left-behind log in case someone comes back looking for it.

Me: “Oh, no, I’m sorry to hear that! I can definitely get someone to check for a bottle if it was recent, or we can check our log and see if it was turned in. Just to narrow it down, what brand of champagne was it?”

Caller: “Um… I don’t know. I wasn’t really paying attention.”

I pause for a moment. That’s a little weird, but maybe she was with someone else getting it.

Me: “Oh, do you not have your receipt on hand?”

Caller: “Huh? Oh, uh… I just didn’t really pay attention. I just grabbed it. I know it had a black label.”

All righty, then.

Me: “Just give me a moment to check for just a bottle of champagne, then, and I can let you know if anyone turned one in—”

Caller: “Hey, uh, you know what? I don’t think it’s even on the receipt.”

Me: “It’s… not?”

Caller: “Yeah, I don’t think it was even rung up.”

Me: “Uh… okay, and to make sure, you’re calling because you think you left a bottle behind, right?”

Caller: “I think… I think the person behind me bought it. I think it ended up with their groceries, and they’re the one who paid for it.”

Well, then. That’s a little different. I’m already spending a little longer on this phone call than expected, but I at least have to clarify what exactly they want here before I can find a chance to hang up, so I try one more time.

Me: “Well, if you want, I can check to see if anyone’s… made a complaint or a return, but if you didn’t actually pay for a bottle, and you don’t have one with your groceries…”

Caller: “Can I not get my bottle of champagne?”

Me: “I think now all I can suggest is that you come back and pick out another one for yourself.”

Caller: “I probably didn’t need to call you about this, did I?”

Me: “Well—”

Caller: “I don’t think you can help me.”

They hung up.

Not Sticking To The Clearance Stickers

, , , , | Right | July 27, 2021

I’m still pretty new and learning little by little every day. It’s my first nine-hour shift on a Sunday with everyone rushing up to the registers five minutes before closing. I have a line of four people with big transactions. I manage to get everyone out of the doors three minutes after closing.

I start collecting all of the hard tags and hangers to take them back to the stockroom. My manager is at the other end of the store shutting down the other registers. Loss Prevention has already left for the day.

Ten minutes after closing, I see a woman with a shopping cart stuffed with kids’ clothes literally running to my register, all smiles.

Customer: “Looks like I made it just in time!”

Me: *Obviously aggravated and wanting to get home* “Actually, we are closed, but I can ring you up really quick.”

She starts tossing her items on the counter, and the first item has a clearance sticker directly on the barcode, which happens occasionally. I price-correct the item and move on to the next. Lo and behold, the next item also has a clearance sticker right on the barcode. And the next, and the next…

At this point, I know that this customer is popping tags like Macklemore. I start staring daggers at her as I have to peel off every clearance sticker to scan the barcode. She becomes fidgety and checks her phone for any coupons we have. She looks up and notices I’ve stopped price-correcting.

Customer: “What are you doing?”

Me: “I noticed that somebody put clearance stickers on active product, so I’m not going to honor the prices on the stickers.”

Customer: *Defensive* “Well, that’s not my problem. This is you guys’ fault for being stupid.”

Me: “You see how the stickers are directly on the barcodes? We always put the clearance stickers above or below the barcodes, never on top. Also, it shows the original price on every clearance ticket and none of them match.”

Customer: “Then who would do such a thing?”

Me: “You tell me!”

There’s silence for a few minutes as I peel off all of the stickers carefully to scan the barcodes. Twenty minutes after closing rolls around, I’m stuck with an armful of go-backs and still helping this customer. She ends up buying about half of the merchandise in her shopping cart and using a coupon.

Customer: *Huffing and puffing* “I’m never shopping here again. What happened to ‘the customer is always right’? You’re a b****!”

Me: *In my best customer service voice* “I hope you have a great night! Thanks for shopping with us!”

Irritated, she grabbed her bag and walked out of the doors, less than ten minutes before I was supposed to clock out. Thankfully, I haven’t seen her since. I told the closing manager exactly what happened, and she was baffled by the situation.