Protecting Against Stupid Customers

, , , | Right | June 25, 2017

(I’m told a call will be coming back to me in the home theater from an upset customer.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I bought a television from you earlier today and the power cord doesn’t work.”

Me: “Okay… what seems to be the problem with it?”

Customer: “It doesn’t plug in right! It goes into the TV just fine but it doesn’t fit the outlet!”

(At this point, there are several possibilities, so I try to start narrowing it down.)

Me: “Was it an open box TV? We’ve been selling a lot of those lately.”

Customer: “No, it was a BRAND NEW TV.”

Me: “Okay, hang on.”

(I check to see if the power adapter is a brick-style that has two pieces. It doesn’t appear to be, but just in case, I ask.)

Me: “What does the power cord look like?

Customer: “It has the end that goes into the TV, and then the other end is just rubber! It doesn’t fit the outlet!”

Me: *as realization is dawning* “Does the rubber end come off the cord? Is it just a protective cap?”

Customer: “…Ha! It sure does! Thanks!”

(After the customer hung up, I uttered what can only be described as Kif’s weary sigh. That wasn’t the only incident today, but it’s the most notable.)

Models Are Always Catty

, , , , | Right | July 26, 2010

(A couple is holding at a kitten and waiting in line at a closed register.)

Me: “Hi, would you like to buy this cat?”

Customer: “I was wondering if I could get this in a different color?”

Me: “Well, we have many different colors of kittens. If you’ll come with me I can show you some others we have.”

Customer: “Well, I mean I want this model kitten, but in a different color.”

Me: “Well, kittens don’t really work that way. They have all different fur patterns and colors.”

Customer: “Yes. I want this fur pattern but a different color!”

Customer’s husband: “Sweetie, I think she’s trying to say that the kittens will look different no matter what.”

Customer: “If she wanted to sell me something, she would look for the right model kitten! This is terrible service! How dare they! Honey, we’re going to a different pet store!”

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