I work in my university’s IT department. We manage hardware like microphones and cameras for the staff working in the same building as us. Occasionally, we have issues with customers returning equipment to the adjacent computer lab instead of to us even though we’re open, or simply not returning the equipment if we’re closed.

My coworker, who manages the hardware for our office, decides that he’s had enough, and he puts a sign on our front door. He leaves feeling satisfied, and I don’t think anything of it.

The next day, within ten minutes of unlocking the front door, I watch a customer approach. She stops and stares at the sign for a moment. She looks at me and I put on my customer service smile even though I’m still waking up. She looks back at the sign on the door and looks confused. Then, she turns and walks away.

I think that is odd, but we have people approach to read some of the signs hung up in our window all the time, so I don’t think much about it. A minute later, the woman appears from behind me, asking about buying a laptop. My heart almost stops.

We share office space with the university’s technology store, so the sales representative steps up and begins talking to the customer and mercifully walks her back around the front desk to where the merchandise is set up.

After a moment’s confusion, I look around to the back room and see the door to the computer lab support cubicles open. She went all the way around past the computer lab support desk, went through their office, and tracked down the side door that connected to our office. We typically keep it locked, but apparently, it was not locked this morning.

Baffled, I turn back as the sales representative concludes a pitch.

“Well, I’ll have to think about it,” the customer says, and she begins walking back around the front desk.

The sales representative says, “Um, ma’am, you can go out through the front door.”

“Oh. You keep reminding me, but I keep forgetting.”

With that, she leaves through the front. I give her a moment to leave and then start laughing with the sales representative about how bizarre it was that she went all the way out of her way and snuck in behind us.

After a moment’s thought, I go around and check the new sign on our door. It’s right above the handle so anyone trying to get in would see it.

“If LOCKED, return equipment to computer lab support desk.”

At the bottom, a huge arrow points toward the other desk.

A few minutes later, another coworker approaches, sees the sign, and enters, confused.

“Why does it say our front door is locked?”

This story occurred several weeks into the recent quarantine. As an immunocompromised person, I have been taking it very seriously and not coming in contact with anyone except my husband. 

However, I was missing my friends desperately, and in an attempt to do something and show our friends how much we missed them, my husband and I hatched a plan. I baked massive batches of lemon bars. The next day, he drove, and I dropped them off on my friends’ porches unannounced, texting them afterwards to tell them we missed them and left them a present.

All went relatively well on the first few stops, but then we got to our last one.

My friend watched us pull up from outside on her porch, shook her head, and walked inside. 

I jumped out of the truck, dropped the container on her porch, and jumped back into the truck.

My friend then came out of the house, held up a finger to indicate I should wait, and popped back inside. 

I rolled down my window and she came back out of her home holding something. She stood about ten feet away from the truck and lobbed a ziplock bag full of home-baked rolls into our open window. 

Turns out, she’d made plans to drop them at our home and had been getting ready to do exactly that. We just shortened it all by a step.

This story was included in our May 2020 Inspirational Roundup.

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My grandma moved in with us about a year ago. Ever since, she has been driving us insane. She hates the way we do things and looks for any tiny excuse to complain and say we hate her. Dad has to serve as intermediary because she refuses to listen to anyone else talk. Then, she complains that Dad never takes her side because, “I’m your mother; you should listen to me!”

She takes a very specific brand of vitamins that aren’t sold in stores, at least not here. Mom orders them for her on Amazon. When the vitamins come, Grandma takes the package to her room before she opens it so no one ever sees the bottle. The pills come with the option to have Vitamin K or not. Grandma wants it with Vitamin K, so that’s what Mom orders.

However, this time, Amazon sent the wrong vitamins and Grandma got the ones without Vitamin K. She doesn’t tell us this until AFTER she takes them all. She blames Mom for giving her the wrong stuff. I’m in my bedroom when this happens, but I can hear every word.

Mom: “I ordered the ones with Vitamin K.”

Grandma: “No, you didn’t! You ordered the ones without Vitamin K. You just don’t want me to have my vitamins. You want me dead!”

Mom: “[Grandma], according to Amazon, I ordered the ones with Vitamin K. Give me a minute to pull it up and I’ll show you.”

Grandma: “Don’t bother! You ordered the wrong ones! You just want to see me suffer.”

She takes the stairlift upstairs but keeps yelling.

Grandma: “I need the ones with Vitamin K. Why can’t you just get me what I want?”

Mom: “That’s what I ordered.”

Dad: “Where’s the bottle?”

Grandma: “In the trash!”

Dad: “Why did you throw it away?”

Grandma: “Because it was empty! I need more. Make sure she orders the ones with Vitamin K. The pills are green! These ones were brown.”

She slams her bedroom door shut. Mom shows Dad what she ordered, and Dad heads upstairs.

Dad: “Mom, [Mom] ordered the right thing. Amazon sent the wrong one. If you had read the label, you would’ve seen that it doesn’t have Vitamin K in it and we could’ve sent them back.”

Grandma: “I don’t read labels! I go by the color!”

Dad: “You need to read the label.” 

Grandma: “No, I don’t! The pills should’ve been green, and these ones were brown.”

Dad: “So… why did you take them?”

Grandma: “Well, I needed vitamins.”

Dad: “But if you had told us, we could’ve fixed it. If you had read the label, we could’ve sent them back before you opened them.”

Grandma: “I don’t read the label! I don’t need to!”

Dad: “What if they had changed the packaging?”

Grandma: “They wouldn’t do that. I’ve been taking these pills for sixty years and they’ve never changed the packaging. The pills are green, and these were brown. Make sure [Mom] orders the right ones!”

Dad: “She did! Amazon made a mistake.”

Grandma: “Why would Amazon make a mistake?” 

Dad: “Because they’re not perfect! They can make mistakes just like anyone else!”

Grandma: “No, they don’t.”

Dad: *Pause* “You’re insane. Read the label next time, and if there’s a problem, tell us so we can do something about it!”

Grandma: “No. I don’t need to read the label.”

Dad leaves her.

Dad: “Crazy lady!”

Customer: “Do you have this jacket in navy?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry, that one only came in black. I do have this jacket — it’s a similar cut — in navy, though?”

The customer is not interested and walks away. A coworker comes over and we start discussing merchandise moves we need to make over the next couple days. I haven’t moved an inch, and it hasn’t even been three minutes when the same customer comes over, stands next to me, and — ignoring me completely — asks my coworker if we have that same jacket in navy.  

Coworker: “No, we only got that one in black, sorry.”

My coworker offers the exact same alternative jacket.

Coworker: “This jacket comes in navy, and is a similar cut, though?”

Not the first — or last — time a customer has asked the same question of multiple employees, but the least subtle one I’ve had in a while.

Every month, all the employees in my small office meet at a local restaurant to discuss business over lunch. We have an agreement with the restaurant that we preorder our meals several days in advance so that the food will be ready soon after we arrive. I am the person who collects the orders each month to send to the restaurant, and just about every month this happens.

Coworker: “This is not what I ordered!”

Server: “I am so sorry, ma’am. Are you not—”

The server reads my coworker’s name from the preorder sheet.

Coworker: “That’s me, but I didn’t order this! I wanted a chicken Caesar salad!”

I bring up the preorder sheet on the phone.

Me: “[Coworker], you ordered a quesadilla, remember? I have it right here.”

Coworker: “No, I didn’t. You wrote it down wrong! I’ll prove it!”

She starts scrolling through sent messages in her phone.

Server: “Would you like me to get you a salad, instead, ma’am? I can take this back.”

Coworker: “No, I guess it’s fine. It’s not what I ordered. But it’s fine. I guess I’ll just eat it…”

She continues scrolling and grumbling.

Coworker: “I can’t find the email, but I know this isn’t what I wanted.”

Server: “Are you sure you don’t want me to—”

Coworker: *Snaps* “No, no, I’ll eat it anyway. It’ll have to do.”

Me: *Mouthing to the server* “I’m so sorry.”

I pull up the original email on my phone.

Me: “[Coworker], here’s the exact email you sent to me. See? ‘I would like to order the quesadilla with a side of chips.’ But if you’ve changed your mind, the server can absolutely bring you something else.”

Coworker: “No, no, no. I didn’t write that! Maybe it was autocorrect. Or if I did, that’s not what I meant. You should know. But it’s here now and I’m not waiting anymore for food.”

Me: *To server* “Thank you so much for everything. We’re all set.”

The coworker will then continue to grumble for the rest of the meal about not getting what they wanted. Every. Single. Month!