We Know Some Talkative People That Could Do That

, , , | Right | June 29, 2020

Me: “We are going to need to change your plan if you do an upgrade. Do you know about how much data you use on your phone per month?”

Customer: “I don’t know. Not that much. I mean, I had the unlimited plan, before, and I never came close to using all of that up.”

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A Doctor Who Hates Having To Fill Out Forms Has Never Had To Wait At A Hospital

, , , | Right | June 28, 2020

I work at a call center for a credit card company and I am processing a credit card application for a woman who is a doctor.

Me: “For your primary residence, do you own, rent, or other?”

Caller: “I thought I said I was a doctor! I told you my salary was [salary] a year before taxes! Why would I rent my residence?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I apologize if my question offended you. However, this is a question we must ask for any credit application. I cannot simply use information that you gave me about your salary to make an assumption about whether or not you own or rent your primary residence.”

Caller: “I said, ‘Why would I rent my residence?’ I am a doctor! You shouldn’t have to check my credit, anyway! Of course, I can afford to pay off my credit card! I am not some bum who uses other people’s property!”

Me: “Ma’am, as I mentioned before, these are questions that we must ask while processing a credit card application. These questions are required by law. Please, help us out.”

Caller: “Oh, my goodness! You people drive me nuts, you know that? [Other Credit Card Company] doesn’t ask me my income or whether or not I rent or own my home! I am reporting this to the Better Business Bureau as soon as this phone conversation is over! I will also be pulling out all my money and opening up accounts with [Other Company]!” *Disconnects*

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It Takes A Lot Of Words To Describe How Much Of A Jerk He Is

, , , | Right | June 27, 2020

I work at a call center for a credit card company. I am processing a cash advance from a customer’s credit card to his checking account.

Caller: “Is this going to be available immediately in my checking account or will I need to wait?”

I have to tell him the exact time frame.

Me: “Oh, yes, sir, it is most definitely available now! In fact, any time you do a cash advance from your credit card with us to your checking or savings account over the telephone or on our website before 9:00 pm CT Monday through Friday, it will be available in the bank account immediately for any transaction. You do not have to wait at all!”

Caller: “Sir, I’m going to be honest with you. When I ask if it will be available immediately, it is a yes or no answer! I expect you to say either yes or no! I do not need a novel-length explanation, okay?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, and I do understand. I was only trying to help you, and this information will help you out should you need to do another cash advance in the future.”

Caller: “I said that I didn’t need your novel-length explanations, you idiot! I do not have time for that!” *Hangs up*

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The Pre-Owned Process Does Not Have Any Cracks In It

, , , | Right | June 26, 2020

I work in a store that handles mostly video games and related items, but we also buy and sell preowned tech.

Me: “Hello, welcome to [Store]. What brings you in here today?”

Customer: “I would like to see what I could get for my iPhone XR.”

Me: “Well, to do that, I need to hook it up to our system. Is that all right?”

The system just verifies that the phone works and hasn’t been jailbroken.

Customer: “Yeah, that would be fine.”

I let the system verify that it works, and the glass and display pass our visual inspection.

Me: “All right, you will get $326 for your phone. Do you want to complete this order?”

Customer: “Not right now; I will be back in later.”

A few hours pass, and I honestly don’t expect to see him back in. It happens all the time. Surprisingly, he actually does come back.

Me: “So, did you decide if you wanted to sell it?”

Customer: “Yes, I want to sell it.”

I start hooking the phone back up to our system.

Customer: “Why are you doing that?”

Me: “I have to do this; we have to check each phone even if we already checked them. This is because our system also wipes your phone.”

Customer: “Oh…”

As I am doing the screen check again, I also realize that he has a screen protector on his phone. When I pull it off, I see that there is a small crack in the corner of the phone so I have to fail the glass. This causes a drop in the price that he will get, due to the fact that we have to repair it to sell it.

I will also state that, with my experience with repairing phones myself, replacing glass isn’t cheap since you also tend to replace the LCD and touch panels, as well, since even small cracks can cause damage.

Me: “Since the phone is damaged, we will only be able to give you $150.”

Customer: “What? My phone is not damaged. I demand you give me the $326.”

Me: “Sir, there is a crack in the glass. This causes the phone to fall under our damaged category. I have to give you the price the system tells you.”

Customer: “You are lying! There’s no damage, and if there is, it’s your fault!”

I start getting pissed, but I stay calm and stand my ground.

Me: “Sir, the screen is damaged so I have to put that it is damaged. Also, at no point did I drop your phone. Do you want to sell us your phone or not?”

Customer: “No, just give me back my f****** phone!”

As he is leaving the store, I hear him call me names under his breath.

Me: *Sarcastically* “Have a great day!”

My manager came out from the back office and asked what had just happened. I explained the situation. He just chuckled and told me I had handled it well. We never heard back from that guy, and I’m glad about it.

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Marking Time Until You’re Called To HR

, , , , | Working | June 22, 2020

I work with three other coworkers. We do not like [Coworker #1]. She likes to track the times we are in and out, and no one is allowed to do that. [Coworker #2], [Coworker #3] and I are in [Coworker #3]’s cube near our signout board.

[Coworker #1] walks over to the board and writes down where she is going. She turns to walk away.

[Coworker #3] is in the middle of a sentence.

Coworker #3: “…and I just don’t understand — 12:49! — why they did that; it is so tacky.”

[Coworker #2] and I look at her in shock.

Us: “Did you just say that out loud?!”

Coworker #3: “What?”

Me: “You just said the time really loudly as [Coworker #1] walked away. “

Coworker #3: “Oh, I guess because I was looking at the clock when she signed out and it was stuck in my head and it just came out.”

Us: “You better tell our boss what you did before she complains that you are marking her time.”

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