The Horrors Of Mispronunciation

| Gilbert, AZ, USA | Right | October 5, 2011

(I am working the counter when a confused-looking customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Do you have any horror movies?”

Me: “Yes, the horror section is over there, past action.”

Customer: “No, no! I mean horror movies.”

Me: “Right, horror movies. Like, scary movies, right?”

Customer: *growing agitated* “No! I mean horror movies!”

(He keeps giving the word slightly suggestive emphasis, so I start to wonder if he’s trying to say something else. He keeps carefully enunciating the whole word, including the last syllable.)

Me: “You are saying ‘horr-OR’ movies, right? Like The Exorcist, Scream, Nightmare on Elm Street?”

Customer: “No! Horror movies. You know, adult movies!”

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Ball Buster Filibuster

| San Jose, CA, USA | Romantic | September 26, 2011

(I work at a video store, where in order to rent movies we ask for a phone number and then read out their name to verify the account. You can have one primary account name, with others added on to it. This particular customer was on the account under his wife.)

Me: “Phone number, please.”

Customer: *reads out number*

Me: “Are you under [name of wife]”?

Customer: “Not tonight. She’s mad at me!”

Also seen on: Not Always Right

A Liberal In The Hand Is Worth Two In The Bush

| Mountain View, CA, USA | Right | September 22, 2011

(While I’m working, a woman comes up to rent a liberal leaning movie. In an attempt to make small talk, I mention that I’m not that into politics, but I really enjoy watching Rachel Maddow’s show on MSNBC.)

Customer: “Who is that?”

Me: “She’s a liberal newscaster.”

Customer: “Oh…well, I’d have to watch 2 hours of Fox just to make up for watching that! I don’t want to get unbalanced!”

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Also In Sync, In Demand, In Stock, And In Waves

| Rice Lake, WI, USA | Right | August 27, 2011

Me: “Thanks for calling [store]. This is [name].”

Caller #1: “How much is it to rent a movie?”

Me: “It all depends. Which one were you thinking of?”

Caller #1:Insidious.”

Me: “That’d be $3.96. That’s with tax.”

Caller #1: “Okay, thanks.” *hangs up*

(About thirty seconds passes before the phone rings again.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [store]. This is [name].”

Caller #2: “How much is it to rent Insidious?”

Me: “That’s gonna be $3.96, with tax.”

Caller #2: “Okay, how much is that?”

Me: “That’s the price. $3.96.”

(There’s about ten seconds of silence before I ask if anyone’s there. I hang up after no response. Thirty seconds later, the phone rings again.)

Me: “Thanks for calling [store], this is [name].”

Caller #3: “Hey, how much is it to rent Insidious with tax?”

Me: “$3.96.”

Caller #3: “Okay, thanks. We’ll be right in!”

Me: *confused*

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The Goblet Of Law Suits

| Reno, NV, USA | Right | April 29, 2011

(I am talking to an older customer. This is a few years ago.)

Customer: “How many Harry Potter movies are out?”

Me: “They just came out with the fourth one. I can’t wait for the next book though.”

Customer: “Oh. Won’t the movie industry be mad that they are making the book before the movie? It will spoil everything.”

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