Can’t Top Their Cheapness

, , , , | Right | September 14, 2020

I am working at the concession of a movie theatre. The lobby has seating for customers and is in plain view of the concession. A customer approaches me with a half-empty popcorn.

Customer: “Hi, could I get some more butter on this, please?”

Me: “Sure!”

Customer: “Oh, and could you top it up while you’re at it?”

Me: “Um… No, sorry, I can’t.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Me: “I can’t give you more popcorn than you paid for.”

Customer: “I just want a full bag! You people never fill the bags up properly; as soon as you shake it a bit, it’s only half full!”

Me: “Sir, firstly, I personally make sure popcorn bags are completely full before they go out. Second, I could see you sitting at that table eating it. I can’t just give you half a bag of free popcorn.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! These places are so cheap!”

The customer starts ranting and I proceed to put butter on what’s left of his popcorn.

Me: *Handing it back* “There you go, sir!”

He glared, snatched the popcorn, and walked away.

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Being A Jerk Is In Her Nature

, , , , , | Friendly | August 23, 2020

There is a nature preserve near my house with a path all around a lake and a floating bridge across one section of it. For a long time, it was made of wood, but in the past few years, it has been replaced with a man-made material. It is constructed of many separate sections to accommodate for shifts in water level, with ramped metal connections in between.

One day, when I’m walking the loop, I decide to take a picture of a duck that is standing no more than two feet from me, completely chill with my presence. I hear someone approaching on the bridge — the connectors unfortunately make a lot of noise when stepped on — think nothing of it, and keep snapping away.

Then, the approaching woman addresses me.

Woman: “The kids must love this, huh?”

Me: *Smiling* “Yeah, they—”

The woman SLAMS her foot on the next metal connector.

Woman: “Such a nice sound, isn’t it?”

I just stare at her, shocked, as she walks to the next one.

Woman: “Coming out here to enjoy the nature and—” *SLAM* “—scaring all the birds away!” *SLAM* “It’s just so nice, isn’t it?” *SLAM*

She proceeded to stomp on every single connector for the entire rest of the bridge, raising her knee to hip-height each time for maximum stompage, repeating her complaints to every single group on the bridge, some of which included small children that never made a peep.

Eventually, she rounded a corner behind some brush, but even a hundred feet away, I could still hear her stomping and complaining all the way back to land.

Relieved to know someone was setting such a good example for the next generation as to how they should act in nature, I turned back to my duck. For some reason, she’d flown away. How odd.

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He Rolls Cheap

, , , , , | Right | August 20, 2020

Teenage Boy: “Can I have two bread rolls?”

Me: “Sure; that’ll be $2.”

Teenage Boy: “I only have $1. Can I still have two bread rolls?”

Me: “No, because they’re $1 each.”

Teenage Boy: “But they’re so cheap! Can you please just give me an extra bread roll?”

Me: “No.”

Teenage Boy: “Please?”

Me: “No.”

The conversation continued like this for several minutes until the manager threatened to throw him out for being a nuisance and for holding up the line. The other customers and serving staff spent the rest of the shift congratulating me for my patience with an obnoxious customer.

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Food By Any Other Name

, , , , , | Right | August 17, 2020

We use various outsourced delivery services for our food and they all have an option for customers to buy food using the platform, but then the customer can choose to come to pick it up themselves. This is to avoid the delivery fee. A customer walks in, lines up, and gets to the front of the line.

Customer: “I have a pickup.”

Me: “Sure, what’s the name or company?”

The customer gives me a weird “Why are you asking this?” face.

Customer: “It’s personal.”

Me: “Well, as you can see I have many bags here for many different customers. I just need a name for the order. If you are uncomfortable to at least let me know what you ordered?”

Customer: *Rolls eyes* “Oh, just give me my food; it’s that one there.”

He points in the general direction of all the bags lined up for various customers.

Me: “Can you please just tell me who the order is for?”

Customer: “It’s for [Customer], okay? Just give me my food.”

The customer took the food and left. My coworker and I just stared at each other in disbelief.

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The Chicken Is Done, And So Am I, Part 2

, , , , | Right | August 15, 2020

I work as a drive-thru and front counter packer at a fried chicken place. During summer, it is extremely busy and the store is full of people. We have understaffed our cooks so we occasionally run out of some chicken items like tenders, chicken fillets, etc.

Customer: “Hi. I’d like a large zinger box, please.”

Me: “Sure, was that all?”

Customer: “Yeah, that’s fine, thanks.”

About five minutes pass. and now he and several other customers are waiting for food. I am told that there will be a ten-minute wait on the chicken fillet for his burger, but I have already made the rest of the meal, so I decide to compromise.

Me: “Hi, sir, I’m really sorry, but I’ve just been told we’ve run out of the fillets for your burger and it’s going to be a ten-minute wait. As you can see, we are really busy, so if it helps I can give you the rest of your food while you wait?”

The customer sighs but seems understanding.

Customer: “Yeah, no worries; that’s fine. I’ll just have the rest of my food now.”

I hand him his food and he sits down and eats it while he waits. Ten minutes later:

Me: “Hi, I’m so, so sorry about the wait, but here is your burger.”

The customer is suddenly in a full fit of rage.


He then slams the burger on the floor amidst all the customers, stomps on it so it goes everywhere, picks up the remainders, and throws it all at me behind the counter.

Customer: “CLEAN THAT, YOU STUPID C***!”

Me: “At least I didn’t spend $13 and wait fifteen minutes to throw my food on the floor like a child.”

He could’ve just gotten a refund! Thankfully, he then stormed out of the store.

The Chicken Is Done, And So Am I

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