A couple of decades ago (maybe more than a couple), I used to work for a car rental company.

Manager: “[Coworker] is going to be late coming back.”

Me: “Didn’t he go pick up a customer who was dropping off their car at [Autobody Shop]? What happened?”

Manager: “He picked up the customer standing out front and made it halfway back to the office before… uh… he realized it wasn’t the customer.”

Me: “Oh, wow. So, some random person just got into the car with him?”

Manager: “Not random. Let’s just say he figured out she wasn’t the customer when she started giving him her… uh… hourly rate.”

[Coworker] finally got back to the office, late, embarrassed, and with a story we would never let him live down.

Many years ago, I decided to rent a van from a [famous moving van company] to move a bunch of stuff from my parents’ house in Nova Scotia to my house in Ontario. A few days after booking the truck, they sent me an email offering me $350 if I also towed a trailer with somebody else’s stuff. It was going to be a pain in the a**, but that was a big chunk of the cost of the rental, so I went for it.

A few days later, I decided to change my truck size, and I tried to contact them to confirm that I could still tow the trailer. I emailed and called multiple times over several days and was bounced between multiple departments, with nobody really knowing what was going on.

Finally, the day before I was supposed to pick up the truck, I called the local hub in Halifax, where we were supposed to stop to get the trailer. I explained the situation. After a little bit of back and forth:

Employee: “I’m very sorry, this is one of those insane things that corporate came up with. There is no way we are giving one customer’s trailer to another customer, and we’ve already told them this multiple times. Do not come to pick up the trailer, and don’t worry, you will still be paid as agreed.”

And I was, and it was good. Doing that drive in a fifteen-foot truck, with a cat, in a snowstorm was pretty stressful, and I’m quite glad I wasn’t also pulling a trailer.

Earlier this fall, I went on a long-anticipated vacation to a lovely tropical island. While waiting to pick up a rental car at the airport, I was able to overhear the following exchange while I was in line at the rental car counter:

Traveler: “Can I get a car that doesn’t have any woke s*** on it?”

Rental Car Employee: “I… I’m not sure what you mean, sir. Can you please explain?”

Traveler: “You know, all that gay pride stuff.”

Rental Car Employee: “…”

Traveler: “I’m not a f**, and I don’t want to drive a car that makes it look like I support that s***.”

Rental Car Employee: “If you mean the rainbows on the plates, sir, this is Hawaii. The Rainbow State. That is what all standard license plates look like here.”

At that point, one of the other rental car employees at the counter waved me over to them. Ten minutes later, I was in my car driving into town. I imagine that the other traveler was still there at the counter, trying to get a rental car with a special non-rainbow, non-“woke”, license plate just for them.

And for the record, I saw multiple rainbows every day while I was there, and each one was beautiful.

Related:
When You Want The Aloha To Be More Of The “Goodbye” Kind Than The “Hello” Kind, Part 4
When You Want The Aloha To Be More Of The “Goodbye” Kind Than The “Hello” Kind, Part 3
When You Want The Aloha To Be More Of The “Goodbye” Kind Than The “Hello” Kind, Part 2
When You Want The Aloha To Be More Of The “Goodbye” Kind Than The “Hello” Kind

I’m helping a family with their vehicle rental at Honolulu airport in Hawaii. They’ve just flown in from middle America.

Me: “And it looks like you’re all set! Any other questions I can help you with?”

Customer: “Yeah, this is my first time in a tropical country. Is that sun normal?”

Me: “Ha, yes, it is pretty hot and sunny here all year round.”

Customer: “But it’s 6 PM, and it’s still so high up in the sky! I heard that it’s sunny here, but that’s crazy!”

Me: “Uh, sir, it’s 2 PM.”

Customer: *Points to his analogue wristwatch.* “No, it’s 6 PM, see?”

Me: “Sir, it’s 6 PM in your home state. It’s 2 PM here in Hawaii.”

Customer: “But I thought Hawaii was America?”

Me: “It is, but America is big. It’s in multiple time zones.”

The customer stares at me blankly for a moment.

Customer: “Oh, is this because Hawaii is one of those states that doesn’t do daylight savings?”

Me: “…Yeeeeah, let’s go with that. Have a great time in Hawaii! Aloha!”

Related:
There’s No Daylight Saving Some People
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 30
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 29
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 28
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 27

I’m the author of this story. For a bit of clarification, when insurance claims are brought in, and the insurance company sets up a rental, the rental coverage is, by default, set for two days. This gives us time to prepare the estimate, and the insurance company to review it. Once the estimate is sent in, the insurance company extends the rental out based on the predicted completion date.

Sometimes, customers don’t realize that part, and they call the shop in a panic because they only have two days of rental coverage. I clarify the situation to them and explain that the insurance company will automatically extend it out, and I send over an email to whoever their adjuster is as a quick courtesy to ease their worries. Normally, this is enough for them, and it puts their minds at ease.

Not with this customer, though.

At the time of writing, repairs are well underway, and we’re going to be wrapping up by the end of the week. The parts are in the paint booth getting painted, and we’re waiting on one other part before we’re finished. As per norm, the insurance company has extended the rental out, with a few extra days of breathing room in case of any delays.

The customer calls the shop, furious. She’s screaming that she’s coming to get her car, that she doesn’t want the repairs done anymore, and she’s taking it to a shop that claims they can fix it in less than a day, and she’s already turned in the rental because they only gave her two days.

I explained to her that the repairs are underway, and the rental was automatically extended. She doesn’t listen, stating that she’d already turned the rental in, and that it’s somehow OUR fault that she’s without a car.

No matter what she says, she won’t listen, and she hangs up.

Less than ten minutes later, she comes storming into the shop and demands her car back. No “hello”, no “hi, can I talk to someone about my car”. Just outright “Give me my car”.

Given she’s the one I just spoke to on the phone, I call my manager over in hopes that he’ll get through to her that the repairs are already underway, and that we can’t give her a car that’s still disassembled and unfinished. He also tells her that if she does take the car, she’ll have to pay the full amount, up front, because the insurance company won’t cover the repairs if she doesn’t get them finished at our shop.

When she started repeating her spiel that she had turned in the rental already, my manager even called her out and said that it was entirely her fault that she doesn’t have a car now, and that we’d even advised how long repairs would take.

I threw her a bone and tried reaching out to her adjuster to get her put back into a rental. By chance, I have both her phone number and email, so I leave her a message and send her an email to try to get the customer put back into a rental. By luck, the adjuster can get her rental going again…but they won’t have availability until tomorrow, meaning the customer will have to take an Uber out of the shop anyway.

I have no sympathy whatsoever for her stupidity.

Related:
Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 25
Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 24
Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 23
Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 22
Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 21