Even This Conversation Is Out Of Tune

, , , , , | Right | June 12, 2020

Customer: “I would like to order a pack of Martin Strings in the gauge of 9-46.”

Me: “Great, do you have an item number or SKU number for those strings?”

Customer: “No, I don’t, I just thought you would have that already.”

Me: “Well, sir, we sell thousands of different musical items every single day and it’s hard to keep record of everything. I would be happy to look that up for you, though.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks!”

As I’m pulling up the item on our website, the customer is mumbling something under his breath.

Me: “Okay, sir, I believe I found the set you’re looking for?”

Customer: “Now make sure it comes in the right tuning of EBGDAE, okay?”

Me: “Well, sir, the strings come how they come and it is up to you to tune them correctly.”

Customer: “So, you mean to tell me that they don’t come tuned?”

Me: “Sir, you have to put the strings on the guitar before you can tune them.”

Customer: “Well, I believe that is bad customer service. If you expect me to order, then you must make sure they are in the correct tuning.”

Me: “Sir, the strings don’t come in a tuning; the term ‘tuning’ refers to the tension you set the string on the guitar that creates a certain pitch. There is no such thing as strings that come in a standard tuning.”

Customer: “Fine. Then I will order from a different company that will tune them for me, so I can play my guitar without sounding like a [disabled slur].”

Me: “Okay, sir, make sure the next company you order from gets the standard tuning for you on the strings!”

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Can’t Drive Through This Deal

, , , , | Right | June 11, 2020

I’m working the drive-thru of our newly-remodeled store and we are having promotions all month long. The current day’s promotion has been heavily advertised, even on the radio: the first 200 people to buy one [value meal] will get one free [sandwich] per week for a full year.

A man comes through the drive-thru during the promotion and demands the free sandwich deal. I calmly explain to him that we have repeatedly stated that the promotion is for dine-in only because we can’t have a line of hundreds of cars in our drive-thru. He continues to complain, even after I state that the giant line of people around the block have already ordered the promotion and he is not eligible.

Eventually, after several managers have explained the same thing, he peels out of the parking lot, nearly running over several small children and a radio station’s van.

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Unfiltered Story #196166

, , | Unfiltered | June 10, 2020

I was assisting a customer over the phone with a program from our company that was acting up. I asked him to provide log files so we could take a look at any issues that may have been recorded therein. I provided a file path to locate the logs and ended the call as it would take home some time to gather the files and email them to me.

The initial email I received from the customer didn’t contain log files, but did state, “What is that? I don’t know what that means?” regarding the file path.

I provided further information explaining what the file path is and a few ways to navigate to the requested files. I even broken it down into simple steps. One suggestion was accessing the files through Finder (the customer had a Mac).

His next response surprised me: “Where’s Finder?” (For anyone who doesn’t know, Finder never closes and is always accessible from the desktop. He might as well have asked, “What’s the Start button?” On a Windows computer.

The guy was nice so I tried as hard as possible not to make him feel bad about not noticing the face in the corner of a computer he’s owned for a few years.

No Body Else To Ask

, , , , | Right | June 8, 2020

I am shopping in a superstore when a man with a heavy accent walks up to me.

Man: “Where can I find body bags?”

Me: “Er… what for?”

Man: “I made a mess, and now I must clean it up.”

I hope he meant trash bags!

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Unfiltered Story #195869

, , , | Unfiltered | June 5, 2020

I was taking my sister to get laser surgery done on her eyes. She is two years older than I am. We have just sat down at the receptionist desk to give her medical card and to pay the co-pay. The receptionist is just making small talk to us waiting for the card to clear before we are seated in the waiting room. She asks me sister her name? My sister replies with her name and then she turns to me and asks me if I her daughter and that I’m so nice to help my mom today. My sister was shocked speechless but I couldn’t stop laughing. When we finally got into to see the doctor she was still mad and told him that he needed to give his receptionist a free treatment since she couldn’t see a thing. All through the appointment I would just turn to her and start laughing without saying a word. I think she told me to shut up 25 times before we went home. Best doctors appointment ever.