Some Coupons Are Always A Gamble

, , , , , | Right | October 3, 2018

(My store offers “instant savings,” which are discounts automatically applied to certain items at the end of their transaction. Some people, however, bring in their instant savings booklet thinking its a coupon they need to show us.)

Me: “All right, ma’am, the till is processing your instant savings, and I’ll give you your total.”

Customer: “Oh! I want to use this coupon!”

(She hands me her instant savings booklet.)

Me: “Don’t worry, ma’am. Those coupons are applied automatically.”

Customer: “Okay, but I’d also like to use this coupon.”

(She hands me a raffle ticket with, “Keep this coupon,” and a string of numbers printed on it.)

Me: “Uh, ma’am, this is a raffle ticket.”

Customer: “No, it says, ‘coupon.’”

Me: “It’s not a coupon, I assure you. It doesn’t show a product to offer a discount on, or an amount to take off.”

Customer: *getting upset* “The lady back there—” *gestures to sales floor* “—said to hold onto that, and I want my money off.”

(I realize I’m not getting anywhere.)

Me: “Oh, you know what? These actually expired yesterday.”

Customer: *dejectedly* “Oh, all right.”

Engineering Cheaper Prices For The Undeserving

, , , , , | Right | September 28, 2018

(I have worked at my store for close to three years while in college to help pay for my degree. This lady comes in to the drive-thru, and I am at the first window taking cash. I notice she has three ten-piece nuggets on her order, at four dollars each, and the twenty-piece we have is on special for five. I decide to try to explain it to her. I genuinely want to make it more affordable for her.)

Me: “Ma’am, are you interested in our twenty-piece nuggets? It’s three dollars cheaper to do that instead of the three ten-piece—”

Customer: *interrupts me* “They are going to different places.”

Me: “The twenty-piece comes in two ten-piece boxes, so the only difference is—”

Customer: *cuts over me again* “Look, I already said I wanted three ten-pieces.”

Me: “It’s going to be so much cheaper; are you sure?”

Customer: “Ring me up or get a manager.”

(At this point, the manager shows up anyway.)

Manager: “Is everything okay?”

Me: “Yes.” *takes the customers money*

Customer: *addressing manager* “This dumb high school dropout can’t even take money correctly. Is she slow? Like, in her brain?”

Me: *addressing manager* “I just told her about our twenty-piece promotion. She said she wants three ten-pieces in separate boxes, so she wouldn’t let me change it.”

Manager: *trying not to laugh, gets the nugget boxes from the grill and holds them up, and shows the customer* “Two ten-piece nuggets.”

(She holds them far apart. Then she brings them together.)

Manager: “One twenty-piece nugget. It’s three dollars cheaper. This girl is not a high school dropout; she is six credits away from her Associate’s, is on the dean’s list, and is majoring in engineering. What was your degree in?”

(My eyes were wide. I mutely handed the customer her change with her receipt. She glanced at it and asked why I didn’t change the price. My manager stepped around me and closed the window. She was easily the most difficult customer I have ever worked with.)

Don’t Drive And Drugs

, , , | Right | September 20, 2018

(I work as a receptionist at a car dealership.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Dealership]! How can I direct your call?”

Customer: “I just want to refill my prescription.”

Me: “I’m sorry. Can you repeat that? I think I might have misheard what you said.”

Customer: “What did you say?”

Me: “Can you please repeat what you said at the beginning of the call? I think I might have misheard you.”

Customer: “Do you need my prescription number?”

Me: “Ma’am, this is a car dealership.”

Customer: “What?! Do you need my prescription number?”

Me: “No, ma’am, this is a car dealership. You may have dialed the wrong number.”

Customer: “You know what? I’ll just call back later.”

(She hung up before I could explain to her this was not a pharmacy. I just hope she was able to get her prescription!)

Food Fraud

, , , , , | Right | September 17, 2018

Me: “Would you like to make a donation of a food item to help a local food bank?”

Customer: “I would if it actually went to them, but I honestly don’t trust you.”

Me: *long pause* “All right, your total is $8.47.”

Unfiltered Story #120917

, , | Unfiltered | September 12, 2018

(Our store offers daily deals, a special price on a specific product each day for that day only. This particular day it is one dozen glazed donuts with clear signage in several locations around the donuts and store.)

Customer: “I have a dozen donuts.”

Me: “Certainly, it will be [price].”

Customer: “But they’re on special today.”

Me: “Oh, they’re all glazed donuts?”

Customer: “No, I picked out an assortment. A dozen donuts are on special today for [price].”

Me: “I’m sorry but only the glazed donuts are on special today.”

Customer: “A lady by the donuts told me it was all of them.”

Me: “One of the bakery staff? Do you know who it was?”

Customer: “No, it was just a lady by the donuts and she said all of them were on special.”

(I call up the bakery and inquire if any of the staff spoke to her about donuts and none of them had.)

Me: “I’m afraid if it was a customer and not anyone on our payroll I can’t give these to you for the special price. Customers aren’t the definitive source for our sales and pricing.”

(Another customer has gotten in line behind her and is listening with amusement.)

Customer #2: “Yeah, I could tell you those are 99¢. Can I get mine for that, too?”

(I give him a relieved smile a little laugh.)

Me: “I’ll take six at that price.”

Customer #1: I’m visiting from *state*. That lady who told me should know what the deals are better than me.

Customer #2: Oh, what part? I’m from *city in same state*.

The first customer gave up and let the subject change, quickly paid her bill and left.

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