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Not Seeing Eye To Eye On This

, , , , | Healthy | May 10, 2018

(It is important to note that every state in the USA has their own laws about eyeglass prescriptions. It is most common in Iowa for optometrists to write prescriptions that only last for one year, though they could write one that would be valid for up to two years. One day, I get this phone call.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Optometrist]’s Office. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Yes, hello! I ordered a box of contacts from you guys about a month ago, for my son, and he says these ones aren’t working. He’s got blurry vision. I know the doctor changed his script a couple times and I just want to make sure the most recent one was ordered.”

Me: “Sure. I’ll pull his file and take a look. Please hold.”

(I go to have a look at the file and my heart sinks. It’s April, and this kid had his eye appointment last June. Kids tend to have a lot of changes in their vision thanks, in part, to hormones. Not only that, but he came back three times with the same complaint of his contacts not working. All of that was within thirty days of his appointment, so his script was finalized in July. And Mom waited to order… until March. I steel myself and pick up the phone.)

Me: “Thank you for holding, ma’am. It looks like the most recent prescription was what we ordered for your son. It is accurate.”

Customer: “Well, he can’t see out of them! Can you take this box back?”

Me: “Is the box unopened? We can do a refund for the box if it is, but we can’t take back an opened box for hygiene reasons.”

Customer: “Of course it’s opened! He’s been wearing them! But they are wrong now.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. The order was placed correctly. We put the same strength that your son told us worked, and so there’s nothing we can do. At this point, he’s almost due for another eye exam, as it is.”

Customer: “So, you’re saying I’m just out, what, $75?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but yes. He saw the doctor last July, and it’s been almost a year. It’s possible his eyes have changed.”

Customer: “That’s just ridiculous! This is the worst service I’ve ever gotten. I’m never bringing him back to your office!”

(And she hung up on me. I’m sorry, but who waits eight months to order contacts and THEN complains? Next time, don’t wait so long!)


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Can’t Discount This Crime

, , , , | Working | May 10, 2018

(As a college student, I work in the evenings and on weekends for a jewelry company. The parent company itself owns a range of store brands, ranging from less expensive mall stores to a chain of large stores with higher-end stock. I am employed at one of the large stores. Their computer and checkout system is still in an older DOS format, and requires a lot of keying to dig deeper for certain information. One evening, I’m assisting one of our diamond sales associates with a very nice couple of regulars. The wife has seen a diamond necklace on our website she really wants to try on. It is a multi-stone strand with a large center stone, retailing for around $5,000.00. We don’t have it in our store, but the surrounding stores in the tri-state area could send us exchange stock if we need it. We check the computer system.)

Coworker: *after a few minutes of keying in commands* “Okay! It looks like our store in [Location one state away] has the necklace you’re looking for in stock. I can send in a request for it tonight, with a temporary deposit, and it should be here within five business days.”

Husband: “Hmm… I don’t know. What if she doesn’t like it?”

Coworker: “It’s not a problem. Since it would be considered an interstore transfer, you are under no obligation to purchase the necklace. If [Wife] decides she wants something different, we refund the deposit and either send it back to the other store or add it to our stock here.”

Wife: “I’d really like to try it on.”

Husband: “All right, let’s have it requested in.”

Coworker: “Great!”

(He processes the transfer request through the system, takes the customer’s deposit, and says we’ll call as soon as it arrives. Since it is already after 5:00 pm, we know the request won’t be received by the other store’s stock manager until the next morning. When I come in for my shift the following evening, I call to confirm the transfer.)

Me: “Hi, [Stock Manager]! It’s [My Name] from [Store Location]. I wanted to confirm the item transfer request we sent last night.”

Stock Manager: “Hi, [My Name]! Sure, just a moment.” *I hear her tapping keys over the phone* “Hmm… That’s strange.”

Me: “What?”

Stock Manager: “It looks like that necklace was purchased last night.”

Me: “Oh, no! My customer really wanted to try it on.”

Stock Manager: “I’m so sorry… Huh. According to this, it was purchased after our store had closed for the day.”

Me: “So, it was an employee purchase?”

(I am surprised a store employee would spend that much on a necklace, even with employee discount. Our salaries aren’t fantastic, since a large portion comes from commissions.)

Stock Manager: “It looks that way.” *more tapping* “Why does…” *frantic tapping and a long pause* “I tell you what; let me dig around some more and call you back. You only work evenings, right?”

Me: “Yeah, evenings and weekends. But [Coworker] will be here at opening tomorrow.”

Stock Manager: “Okay, I promise I’ll get back to you by tomorrow.”

(We hang up, but I don’t have time to dwell on it because more customers have come into the store. Later that night, after we close, I have some free time while the night supervisor counts the cash drawers. I decide to see if I can find that necklace at another location. The closest store is still the one it was purchased at the night before; however, I soon realize that since it is an employee purchase, I can command the system to pull up that employee number’s entire purchase history. The screen fills up with DOZENS of high-dollar purchases, including earrings, necklaces, rings, and watches. There is nothing under $3000, and the most expensive one I see is a $20,000 luxury brand watch. There is no way this employee can afford all of this stuff, unless they have a secret cash flow and are just working at the store for the heck of it, which seems unlikely. My store’s stock manager also happens to still be there, so I call her over to show her. Her eyes bug out as she starts going through the employee’s purchase records. She tells me to not mention this to any of the other staff members until she speaks with our supervisor and the stock manager of the store in [Other State]. The very next night, I walk into the store and am pulled aside by [Coworker].)

Coworker: “[My Name]! I got a call from [Other Location] today!”

Me: “What happened?”

Coworker: “The employee who bought the necklace we wanted? She was a night supervisor who transferred in recently. Apparently, she was approaching customers in the parking lot who were interested in expensive items but didn’t want to pay the asking price. She’d tell them she could get them the same item for a price just above her own employee rate, and would do the cash transactions with them at other locations!”

Me: “Oh, my God! But there were five years’ worth of transactions there. How’d she get away with it for so long?”

Coworker: “She’d wait until the store was closed to do the transactions, then come back in the next evening and reenter the transactions as if they’d happened on other dates. No one bothered to put in the codes to check.”

Me: “Wow… So, I’m guessing she’s fired?”

Coworker: “Fired, and being taken to court by [Parent Company].”

(As a thank-you, the [Other Location] stock manager worked with my stock manager to get the same necklace transferred over from a farther away location with no additional deposit needed. The store also let us offer it to our regular customers for less than the asking price, since they had to wait two weeks for it to come in. I left that job about six months later, after graduating college, for a job in my field. I always wondered what happened to that supervisor.)

Hello From The Cheddar Side

, , , | Right | May 10, 2018

(I have just started at a sandwich chain. After a week, I start doing overnight shifts. This customer’s order starts off normal. They want their sandwich basic, with a different cheese on each side, and minus one veggie. The two cheeses are easy to tell apart, as one is bright yellow and the other is white.)

Me: “And what would you like on this, ma’am?”

Customer: “I would like a little of everything except spinach on the Swiss cheese side, please.”

(I start off by putting spinach on cheddar side.)

Customer: “I want that on the cheddar side.”

Me: *puzzled look* “Ma’am, that is the cheddar side.”

Customer: “Yes, and I want it on that side.”

(I try putting it on the other side, thinking they’re confused on the cheeses somehow.)

Customer: “THE. CHEDDAR. SIDE.”

(I put it back on cheddar side. I am at a total loss at this point.)

Customer: “See? That wasn’t so hard, now, was it?”

Getting The Last (Name) Word

, , , , | Working | May 10, 2018

(My last name is also a first name. We’ll pretend it’s Jane McKenzie.)

Me: “I’m here to pick up my new glasses.”

Assistant: “Okay, what’s the last name?”

Me: “McKenzie.”

Assistant: *rolls eyes with exasperated sigh* “I said, I need your last name. So, that’s McKenzie what?”

Me: *sighs* “Yes, and I heard you. My last name is McKenzie. My first name is Jane.”

Assistant: “Your last name is a woman’s first name.”

Me: “My maiden name was always getting mangled in spelling and pronunciation, so I was happy to change it to a last name that was much easier to spell and pronounce when I got married.”

Assistant: “You should change it again.”

Me: “No, I don’t think so.” *rubs temples* “Are my glasses ready or not?”

Assistant: *with heavy emphasis on my last name* “Yes, Mrs. McKenzie, they are ready.”

(After I got my glasses, I made sure to complain to the optometrist about his assistant’s behavior and insistence that I change my last name, and have never gone back to that clinic.)

Preorder Disorder

, , , , | Right | May 10, 2018

(At our store, if a customer calls to ask for a product that is in stock, we set it aside for them. If it isn’t in stock, we let them purchase the item to pick up later. A customer comes up claiming he paid for an order by card and is here to pick it up.)

Me: “Okay, I just need to see a photo ID for the order.”

Customer: *shows me ID from inside the wallet*

Me: “Could I just have you pull it out so I can verify the ID?”

Customer: “What do I need to do that for?”

Me: “I just need to check it under a blacklight.”

Customer: “Why can’t you look at it right here?” *getting irritated* “The picture is clearly me.”

(The manager comes over to try to help, and I explain the situation.)

Manager: “I’m sorry, but we need to verify the ID to release the item to you because it was paid for by credit card. If you’d like, I can refund the card, cancel the order, and let you purchase one; we have more in stock.”

Customer: *screaming* “I can’t believe this! I bought this f****** game to pick up when you have it, and now you won’t give me the d*** thing! It’s my ID issued by the state, and you have no f****** right to take it out of my wallet!” *storms out*

(We wrote down the name on the card, since it is highly likely this was a fake ID.)