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He Wants What He Wants

, , | Right | July 28, 2008

Camper: “Can I get a root beer float?”

Me: “No, you can only order a single scoop cup or cone.”

Camper: “So I can get one?”

Me: “You can get a single scoop ice cream, cup, or cone.”

Camper: “So can I get a root beer float?”

Me: “You can get a cup or cone, single scoop or ice cream. That’s what you can get. Got it?”

Camper: *nods*

Me: “So what are you getting?”

Camper: “A root beer float.”

Me: “Are you seriously not getting this?”

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Whipped

, , , , | Right | July 28, 2008

Customer: “Can I get a pumpernickel bagel and a plain bagel in a bag?”

(I get him his bagels. He looks at the bag with a wistful expression.)

Customer: “Pumpernickel bagel.”

Me: “Yep.”

Customer: “Keeps the peace at home, you know?”

Me: “Um, sure.”

Customer: “Really does. Twenty-three… no, thirty-four years of marriage and it’s come to this. Pumpernickel bagel.”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Pumpernickel… bagel.” *leaves*

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Maybe That’s Her Good Side

, , , , | Right | July 28, 2008

Customer: “Do you take passport photos?”

Me: “Yes, we do. Do you want one taken?”

Customer: “Yes, please.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am. Just stand in front of the screen, please, and I’ll take your photo.”

(She walks up and stands in front of the white screen; she’s facing the background with her back towards me. My coworkers can barely keep it together at this point.)

Me: “Ma’am, you’re going to have to turn around if you don’t want the back of your head on your passport.”


This story is part of the Customers-Are-Bad-Photographers roundup!

Read the next Customers-Are-Bad-Photographers roundup story!

Read the Customers-Are-Bad-Photographers roundup!

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Someone Needs To Go Back To School

, , , | Right | July 27, 2008

Me: “Photography studio, how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, hi, I just received a second notice…”

Me: “… for your yearbook session?”

Customer: “Yeah, well, for my daughter. I’m just calling to see if this is a scam.”

Me: “No, ma’am, we work with your daughter’s high school. If she doesn’t have her photo taken within the next three weeks, it won’t appear in the yearbook.”

Customer: “Oh… so do you offer a class?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You know, a class for parents who don’t really understand this whole process?”

Me: “Well it’s really not that complicated. Your daughter just has to come to the studio and have her picture taken. It will probably only last twenty minutes. If you want more information on the sessions we sent out brochures with the first notice or you can go to our website.”

Customer: “So… you don’t offer a class?”

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Please, Please Listen To Yourself Talk

, , , , | Right | July 27, 2008

(At our library, the computers are all self-sign up. All you have to do is type in your name and library card number. This is clearly posted on the side of the monitor. In walks a young woman and her boyfriend.)

Young Woman: “Can you help me with this?”

Me: “What’s the problem?”

Young Woman: “I don’t know what to do.”

Me: “The instructions are on the side of the monitor.”

Young Woman: “But why can’t you tell me how to do it?”

Me: “Because it’s SELF-SIGN UP.”

Young Woman: “But I need help!”

Me: “All you have to do is type in your name and library card number.”

Young Woman: “But do I have to read the screen?”

Me: *confused* “Of… course. The screen tells you when to type in your information. You have to read the screen.”

Young Woman: “BUT I DIDN’T COME INTO THE LIBRARY TO READ!”

Young Woman’s Boyfriend: *turns abruptly and walks out the door*

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