Gore-Tex Vortex

, , , , , , | Right | August 14, 2018

(A customer storms in with a pair of boots and slams them down on the counter.)

Customer #1: “Feet wet, boots Gore-Tex, money back, NOW!”

Me: *looking the boots over* “How long have you had them?”

Customer #1: “A year, but that doesn’t matter… Money back, NOW!”

Me: “Actually, it does.”

(I ask him to follow me to the footwear wall where all our boots are displayed, and I begin explaining to him that Gore-Tex is a one-way valve material in between layers of the footwear. It allows your perspiration to escape in the form of water vapor, but Gore-Tex is not what keeps the outer materials dry. That is a repellent called DWR, and it needs to be renewed at least once a year.)

Customer #1: “You have no idea what you’re talking about, and if you don’t give me my money back right now, I’ll have no choice but to talk with your manager.”

(Just then, another customer looking at footwear chimes in. He is older, with grey hair and glasses.)

Customer #2: “Excuse me. I don’t mean to interrupt… but he’s absolutely spot on with his simplified definition.”

Customer #1: “This isn’t any of your business!”

Customer #2: “Actually, it is. You see… I am one of the scientists who originally developed Gore-Tex. Perhaps you should listen to this gentleman; you might learn how to take care of your boots properly.”

Customer #1: “When I bought these boots, no one told me I had to maintain them.”

Me: “That may be so, and if it is, you have my apologies. Other than the DWR having worn off the outer of the boots, it looks like they still have plenty of life in them.”

(I hand him a can of water repellent from the shelf.)

Me: “By the way, I am the manager… and this one’s on me.”

Unfiltered Story #118211

, , | Unfiltered | August 14, 2018

I am a counter person we have a small but great menu

Customer: hi do you have peel and eat shrimp?

Me: no we dont, sorry.  However we offer fried shrimp and some other popular options.

Customer: so you don’t have peel and eat shrimp?

Me: no, sorry.

Customer are you sure?

Me: yes i’ve been here for a while.

(The customer hems and haws then decides on a drastically altered version of our most popular item)

Customer: oh and i am local, can i get the discount?  I work at the psychic place around the corner !

Me:  ok, wait you work where?  Un nevermind….(price with discout)**  facepalm**

I suppose she can not see the future if its a resturant.

Unfiltered Story #118209

, , | Unfiltered | August 14, 2018

Me:  How can I help you today.

Customer: I want 40% off these items.

Me: Ma’am its only off certain items. see the sign says that .
I will go ahead and honor it but next time please look at the sign.
customer: Now yelling at me. HOW DARE YOU TELL ME THAT I’M A CUSTOMER I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO READ YOUR SIGNS, NOR SHOULD I BE EXPECTED TOO.

Customer behind here shook her head then said yes you should.

Sad thing is I am the one who got reprimanded and for being rude to the customer and hurting her feelings.

It amazes me the things people say.

One Ink To Rule Them All, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | August 14, 2018

(I work at a well-known office supply and electronics store. A customer calls the store to complain about a product she has purchased.)

Customer: “I’d like to make a complaint against the store.”

Me: “Okay. What happened?”

Customer: “Your employees are idiots and gave me the wrong ink for my printer, and now I have to drive all the way back to the store. I’d like to be credited for the time that I’ve lost, as well as for the ink cartridge.”

Me: “I’m sorry about the service you received;we try our best. What ink cartridge did you ask them for?”

Customer: “I told him it was an [Extremely Popular Brand].”

Me: “Did you give them a printer model number or an ink cartridge number?”

Customer: “I am a busy person and don’t have time to find that kind of information. You guys are supposed to know what I need!”

Me: “There are thousands of printers and cartridges. We can’t possibly know what you need without a printer model or ink cartridge number”

Customer: “Well, then, why did he sell me this ink cartridge? Is that how you train your employees? You have them sell things to people even when it’s not going to work”

Me: “You said the box looked the same and you were going to try it.” *click*

Related:
One Ink To Rule Them All

Happiness Reduces After Employment

, , , , , | Right | August 13, 2018

(I am the customer in this story. I decide to get some snacks after getting gas. I walk into the convenience store, where I see a sign that says, “Now hiring happy people!” I walk up to the counter after selecting my items.)

Me: “I’m just waiting for the lawsuit for discrimination because you only hire happy people.”

Employee: “Yeah, discrimination against sad people.”

Me: “I should start a business where I only hire sad people.”

Employee: “I wonder what kind of business that would be.”

Me: *after thinking a second* “Political!”

(The employee cracks up, and so does customer behind me.)

Customer: “Well, at least they can’t tax humor!”

Me: “They can try!”

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