A customer comes up with “They Both Die at the End” by Adam Silvera. 

Customer: “What’s this book about? Is it the same as the new TV show?”

I explain the plot.

Customer: “It sounds depressing. I don’t think you should stock this anymore.”

Me: “Well, it’s not up to me; it’s up to my boss. I read it myself and there are some sad parts, but overall, it’s a good book.”

Customer: “I still don’t like it. I wouldn’t approve of my daughter reading this, anyway.”

Me: “That’s completely up to you.”

Customer: “Yeah, I don’t know why she likes all these teen books. She just graduated college. She should be reading authors like Judy Blume or that one author with the book about fires. The one with the Asian name.”

She set down the book on the counter and purchased some romance novels.

We are short-staffed due to a coworker choosing not to show up at all for the past several days, so my coworker and I are considerably backed up. We are informing all walk-in customers of an up-to-thirty-minute wait time.

A woman walks in while we are in the midst of this. We inform her of the wait time, and she agrees and places her order. As soon as it’s paid for, she walks to the counter where food is to be assembled and picked up and immediately sprawls all the way across it. When I try to get her to move, she just moves a few inches aside, ignoring the fact that another customer literally has to reach around her and get his food.

One of our other waiting customers, an older woman, likely already irritated by the long wait, speaks up.

Older Woman Customer: “Miss, could you back away from the counter? We’re all supposed to be staying six feet apart and you’re getting too close to everyone picking up.”

Without even looking up from her phone, the first customer answers:

Customer: “No, I think I’m fine right here.”

Seeing as she’s STILL taking up the entire counter and isn’t even wearing a mask — meaning she’s pretty much breathing all over everyone else’s food — I speak up, as well.

Me: “Actually, no, ma’am, you’re not fine right there. I need you to back up furth—”

Customer: “I said I’m fine right here. I’m not breathing on nothing; this b**** needs to mind her business.”

The woman who chimed in starts arguing with her, insisting that Miss Sprawl-Across-the-Counter back up and that she doesn’t want anyone that close to her or anyone else’s food, while the younger woman continues to just stay put and complains that she shouldn’t have to. Other customers are beginning to come to the older lady’s defence. In an effort to diffuse the situation, I finally tell the older lady:

Me: “I’ll just put y’all’s food over here, then.”

I indicate the rack several feet over meant for web orders.

As soon as I say that, the woman decides she wants her money back because she feels insulted.

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to move for this b****!”

I don’t think I’ve ever been so quick to refund someone. Once I hand her the money back, she hangs for just a moment longer before quipping:

Customer: “Uh. You didn’t say, ‘Thank you.'”

Me: “No, ma’am, I didn’t.”

I went back to serving our thoroughly-entertained remaining customers, ignoring Miss Sprawl-Across-the-Counter as she stormed out.

Related:
Sub-Standard Behavior, Part 2
Sub-Standard Behavior

Our frozen yoghurt store has a water dispenser that has a metal tab that you can push down for water. The tab is kind of delicate, and if people push too hard on it, it could potentially break and we’d have to replace it.

I’m cleaning behind the counter when a mother and her two daughters walk in. The store is pretty crowded, so I don’t pay much attention to them. I ring them up and start serving the next people in line.

As I’m serving the next person, the kids from earlier go to get a drink of water. The water jug is empty because I can’t refill it when I’m serving the other guests. They start jamming and ramming the metal tab down, and it’s making an awful, loud noise.

Me: “Excuse me, girls. Please stop jamming on the tab. You might break it.”

The girls immediately whip around and look at me like a deer in the headlights. A coworker comes in and helps me clean up the store from the previous crowd. When the crowd has died down, the mother of the kids comes over to me while I’m sweeping.

Mother: “Excuse me, is the manager here?”

Me: “No, ma’am, she’s not here right now. Is there something I can help you with?”

Mother: *Condescending, passive-aggressive tone* “My daughters said that you yelled at them and that you were mean to them. That was very uncalled for. You can’t be mean to my daughters like that.”

Me: “Ma’am, I was trying to tell your daughters to not jam in the water tab. They were jamming it so hard that they were going to break it.”

Mother: “I know but that was very uncalled for. I’m not going to get you in trouble, but if it happens again, I will call your manager. Do you understand, sweetie?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, you have a good day now.”

I told the whole story to my manager the next day, and she was unimpressed with the lady. 

Manager: “Her kids shouldn’t have been jamming on the handle in the first place. If you see her again, tell me and I’ll deal with her.”

It’s nice to have an understanding manager that knows that customers can be crazy sometimes.

Me: “Can you please tell me the difference between [menu item #1] and [menu item #2]?”

Cashier: “The ingredients.”

Full stop.

Me: “…”

I work for a popular coffee chain, and, like most food service establishments, we have a strict policy against non-service pets in the store. State laws allow us to ask if it is a service animal, but it is illegal to ask for documentation; if they say yes, we must take them at their word. 

A man is standing in line with a small dog in his arms.

Me: “Excuse me, sir, but is that a service animal?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “I am sorry, sir, but we don’t permit animals in our store unless they are service animals.”

Customer: “But what about [treat we give for free to dogs]?”

Me: “Sir, we are happy to give you one of those for your dog, but someone needs to wait outside with the animal.”

He walks away, looking confused, and returns almost immediately, still holding the dog.

Customer: “You’re breaking the law!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “You’re breaking the law! You can’t ask someone if their pet is a service animal!”

Me: “Yes, I can, sir. As I said, that is our policy and it is my job to enforce it.”

Customer: *Getting more irate* “No, you are breaking the law!”

Me: “I only know what I am told, sir. I am not breaking any law.”

Customer: “Yes, you are!”

This whole time, one of our regulars is standing nearby waiting for his coffee. He is one of my favorite customers; he is a very kind, friendly man, and he also happens to be very large and fit. He finally turns exasperatedly toward the irate customer.

Regular: “No, she is not. I know the laws, and she is not breaking them. You are wrong!”

The customer held his tiny dog a little closer, muttered something, and then walked away. My regular got his coffee for free on his next visit!

Related:
Doing A Disservice To Service Animals, Part 7
Doing A Disservice To Service Animals, Part 6
Doing A Disservice To Service Animals, Part 5
Doing A Disservice To Service Animals, Part 4
Doing A Disservice To Service Animals, Part 3