At a burgers-and-frozen-custard drive-thru, we order our meals, and I request a mini sundae of their flavor of the day. This is my minor bad — I miss that their menu has “mini” mix-in shakes but only “small” sundaes — but things get strange from there. The order display says “FOD SUNDAE 2”, with what I only realize as we pull away from the speaker is their two-scoop sundae’s price, which explains the notation. We try to clear that up at the payment window.

Me: “I ordered a mini sundae, but I think the order display may have shown a two-scoop sundae.”

Cashier: “Oh! Sorry. Did you want the mini mix-in, instead?”

Me: “No, a mini sundae, please.”

Cashier: “Oh! Sorry. You want a single scoop of the flavor of the day?”

Me: “Do you have a mini sundae?”

Cashier: “Uh, we have a small sundae.”

I apologize for my sizing confusion and say that the small sundae sounds great. He runs the charge, hands the card back, and asks us to park and wait for our food, and they bring the meals… but no sundae. The receipt shows we were charged for it, so we go back through the drive-thru and are asked to pull to the payment window.

When we arrive, the cashier is holding a small sundae, obviously in the flavor of the day, exactly right.

Cashier: “Here you go. Sorry about that!”

Employee #2: “No, wait! It’s supposed to be the flavor of the day!”

She grabs the sundae from him and runs away. The cashier calls helplessly after [Employee #2].

Cashier: “But that is the flavor of the day!”

The employee soon returned to thrust at the cashier a cup with a single plain scoop of the same custard with no sundae toppings. Then, she rushed off again. The cashier blinked after her and hesitantly offered us the custard. We didn’t have time to try to sort it out further, so we accepted it and left.

I looked up the prices later from the receipt. It looks like it was rung up as a single non-sundae scoop and we thus got what we paid for even if not what we ordered, but it’ll be a while before we consider going to their drive-thru again. At least the eventual custard was good!

It’s November and I am at a neighbor’s house, babysitting their three-year-old and four-month-old. I’m about fifteen when this occurs.

The toddler and I have just finished decorating a play Christmas tree his parents got him, and I ask him to pick out his PJs while I get the baby a bottle. 

My phone rings, and I don’t recognize the number, but their mother just got a new phone, so I answer. 

Telemarketer: “Hello! Have you heard about the new laws affecting Medicare? We can help—”

Me: “Sorry, I’m not eligible or interested. Please take me off your list.”

Telemarketer: “I promise, we can save you money!”

Me: “Sir, I’m like, fifty years away from being eligible. Please take me off your list. Thank you.”

I hang up the phone and start feeding the baby. The phone rings again, and for some reason, I answer again, putting it on speaker as my hands are full with the baby and the bottle. It’s the same telemarketer.

Telemarketer: “It seems we got disconnected! I was telling you about the—”

Me: “Sir, I told you, I’m not interested! Please remove my number! And if you could, please hang up!”

Telemarketer: “I cannot hang up on a customer, but I can help you save money!”

I hang up and once again, he calls back. I’m still not sure why I answer again, other than being fifteen and dumb.

Telemarketer: “I must have a bad connection today! We got disconnected.”

Me: “Hey, [Toddler], come here.”

Toddler: “Yes?”

I hand him the phone.

Me: “It’s Santa. He wants to know what you want for Christmas.”

I was able to get the baby fed, burped, bathed, changed, and in bed and draw a bath for [Toddler] before he finished his list.

Surprisingly, the telemarketer didn’t call back after that.

Elderly Gentleman: “I’d like to buy one of those fancy video players. You know, the ones that play CDs but with films on them?”

Now, you could forgive him for the description, given his age, but when he seemed totally convinced that we — a supermarket, not a tech shop — sold a DVD player that CHANGES THE DISC FOR YOU WITHOUT HAVING TO TOUCH IT… I politely gave him directions to a larger retail store at that point.

This was about fifteen years ago, so if such technology exists now, please let me know.

I’m waiting in line to mail out a package. There’s a family of five ahead of me with three boys aged between eight and sixteen getting passports made. After the pictures are taken and the postmaster is printing off the booklet, there’s a buzzing sound and I hear the following conversation.

Youngest Son: “Mom, what’s that noise?”

Mom: “That’s dial-up Internet — a sound none of you will appreciate.”

Oldest Son: “So that’s what that sounds like?!”

It’s a couple of days before Christmas and, as expected, it’s busy. I’m working the self-checkout area and often have to deal with customers who will completely disregard the line that has formed and check out. The line is fifteen-plus customers deep.

I notice a customer cutting in line to use a register.

Me: “Excuse me, sir, but the line for this register starts back there.”

I point to the long line of patient patrons.

Customer: “YOU CAN KISS MY A**!”

Me: *Taken aback* ” Excuse me?”

Customer: “I’m not waiting in that long line!”

Me: “Then you’re not using this machine.”

I go to my station where I have access to all the machines and get ready to shut down this guy’s register if he tries to use it. I’m looking at him and he’s looking at me. Finally, he gives up and walks furiously toward me.

Customer: “Fine. Then you can put it back on the shelf, a**hole!” *Storms out*