Trouble Brewing, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | May 5, 2010

(An obviously underage girl sets a 12-pack of beer on the counter.)

Me: “Hi, how’s it going? Can I see your ID?”

Customer: “Sure!”

Me: *checks date of birth on the ID.* “Uhh, ma’am? This says you’re only 17. I can’t sell you the beer.”

Customer: “What! Let me see that!” *checks ID* “D*** it! I gave you the wrong one. Well, can I buy a pack of cigarettes?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Why the h*** not?”

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Fake On A Break

, , , , , | Right | February 12, 2010

Me: “May I see some ID, sir?”

Customer: “Uh, yeah. Here.”

(I take a look at the ID and am utterly speechless. It is by no means a bad fake, but the kid made one mistake when he ordered it. I motion over the bar manager, because I am utterly speechless. I hand him the fake.)

Manager: *laughing* “Kid, your fake says you are 19!”

(Everyone in line began laughing, and the kid took off. I noticed at least three other people in line check the date on their licenses.)

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No Wonder He’s Always Stuffed

, , , , | Right | February 11, 2010

(Seated at one of my tables is a grown woman. Placed across from her is a stuffed animal.)

Me: “Welcome to [Restaurant]. Can I start you off with a drink?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like a diet Coke.”

Me: “Okay, one diet–”

Customer: *gestures to stuffed animal* “…and he’ll have your house wine.”

Me: *laughs, playing along* “He doesn’t look over 21, ma’am.”

Customer: *completely serious* “Oh, you’re right. He’ll just have a lemonade, then.”

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Fake ID Is Always A Gamble

, , | Right | December 31, 2009

(I’m a member of the security staff at a casino, and three men approach me, one of them looking a little young.)

Me: “Can I see some ID?”

(The youngest one gives me an ID where it says he’s 22. I ask him how old he is just to check.)

Me: “How old are you?”

Customer: “17.” *pauses* “Ah, I f***ed up, didn’t I? I’ll just wait in the car.”

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A Hazy Legal Maze

, , , | Right | December 18, 2009

Customer: “What cigarettes would you recommend?”

Me: “I’m actually only 16. I don’t smoke.”

Customer: “Oh.. Well, then, which cigars are your favorite?”

Me: “I’m only 16. I don’t smoke.”

Customer: “Okay, then. Do you sell marijuana?”

Me: “That’s actually illegal.”

Customer: “What? When did that happen?”

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