Unfiltered Story #92981

, , | Unfiltered | September 1, 2017

(Me, my grandmother, my dad, my mum and my two brothers were in the car and me and one of my brothers were trying to get my other brother to say his own name.)

Me: “Say [Brother #2’s Name].”

Brother #2: “No!”

Brother #1: “Say [Brother #2’s Name].”

Brother #2: “No! Bad boy [Brother #2’s Name]!”

Chester Bennington Was His Grandma

, , , | Working | September 1, 2017

Me: “Where is [Worker]? He hasn’t signed in for the early shift?”

Manager: “He came to me yesterday saying his grandmother had died. He said he needed to take today off for the funeral. He promised he would be back tomorrow.”

Me: “Which grandmother?”

Manager: “With it being such a sensitive topic, I didn’t want to pry.”

Me: “His mother’s grandmothers are in the store right now. I just caught up with them as I came in. His father’s grandmother lives in Australia, so unless I’ve just met the Messiah, I very much doubt he’s going to a funeral in Australia and has the time to be back tomorrow morning.”

(The manager blushes and starts making some phone calls.)

Manager: “I can’t get through to him.”

(I searched the store and found his grandmothers. They told me he traveled south for a get-together with friends. They weren’t too impressed when I told them about his story, and  they agreed to phone him. They assured me he’d be back up the next day with a written apology. He handed both myself and the other manager an apology, and did seem genuinely sympathetic. While he left, I noticed a new tattoo on his arm of Linkin Park’s logo, with the weekend’s date underneath. Seems like it was probably more than just a get-together, but to claim a family member had died…)

Unfiltered Story #92589

, , | Unfiltered | September 1, 2017

(The library I work at has recently had a new system installed. Now it alerts us if someone has already taken a book out previously, which can be helpful if
a customer reads a lot of a similar genre or series like Mills & Boon books. Usually we just let the customer know about the alert and ask if they want to take the book again anyway. A customer comes to my desk just as my colleague informs the customer they are serving that they’ve taken a particular book out before.)
My customer: “I hate it when you lot tell me that.”
Me: “Oh. Well, the computer tells us automatically, and some people don’t remember what they’ve read and don’t like to reread a book.”
Customer: “It’s none of your business what I read. I don’t think you should be able to see that information.”
Me: *unsure if he’s joking* “Well, we see the books when you bring them to the desk anyway?”
Customer: *ignoring me* “Should be freedom of information or something like that. You shouldn’t know what I have out. It should all just go blank after you’ve scanned it out. It’s none of your business.”
Me: *giving up* “Well, I’ll try to remember not to tell you when you’ve taken a book out before. Umm, did you want your other books renewed?”
Customer: “Yes please. Wait…which books do I have out?”
Me: “…”

Coffee For The Masses

, , , | Working | August 31, 2017

(I work on reception in an office located in one of England’s industrial estates, where there are few nearby shops. Twice a day, a coffee van drives past my work to sell snacks, and I go out every morning for a caffeine fix. One morning, an executive director walks past my desk and starts handing me some money.)

Director: “I’m going into a meeting with the other executive directors for a couple of hours. Can you get me [four coffees].”

Me: “No worries; [Coffee Guy] should be here any minute.”

Director: “How much will that be?”

Me: “No more than £10, probably.”

Director: “Here’s £15, and get one for yourself.”

Me: “Thank you! Are you sure?”

Director: “Of course. It’s not your job to get me coffee.”

(Almost everyone in my office is lovely. To have the directors respecting everyone in the building – even “lower” [for lack of a better word] people and people in completely different departments – just reminds me what a great job I have.)

An Aura Of Accusation

, , , | Friendly | August 31, 2017

(I am in my dentist’s waiting room. A woman comes in, sees me, and makes a big display of sitting as far away as possible from me. After a few minutes, she stands up and stands right next to me. I move over, but she continues. She then leans down and sniffs.)

Woman: “My aura is very cloudy. Have you committed a crime?”

Me: “No?”

Woman: “Murder? Molestation?”

Me: “No. Umm, could you leave me alone?”

(She returns to her seat on the other side of the room for a few moments, before getting up and leaving altogether. A few minutes later and receptionist comes in.)

Receptionist: “I’m really sorry about this, but the intern phoned the police because another patient said you tried to molest her.”

Me: “WHAT?”

Receptionist: “We have cameras here.” *points* “And we’ve checked them before the police arrive. It’s obvious she was acting strange and making you uncomfortable. We called the police again, but they’re wanting to take a statement.”

(I was there for nearly an hour, and had to rearrange for another appointment. The woman had completely disappeared after accusing me, but the police officers said they knew of her and that she should be admitted to a secure unit, but her estranged family were making it difficult to get the paperwork through.)

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