Unfiltered Story #208854

, , , | Unfiltered | September 22, 2020

So I work as a marshall in a laser quest arena. Mainly, our customers are kid’s birthday parties and the like, but every so often we have groups of teens/adults, and they’re my favourite. It means I can have a bit more fun, be more teasing, y’know.

So I’m taking care of a group of university girls and after their game finishes, I’m walking around the room hooking the equipment up to the wall so it can charge overnight (it was closing time by this point.)
As I walk past one girl, she slutdrops, not realising I’m behind her, and she inadvertently grinds against me. As a naturally joker-type person, I say something along the lines of “Jeez, at least buy me a drink first!” Needless to say, her entire group of friends proceed to embarrass the poor girl as they make their way out of the establishment! Cut to 10 minutes later, my manager and I walk out of the building to finish locking up and the group of girls are still there. The girl that accidentally dry-humped me walks over and gives me her number, and we have now been together for about half a year!

Open Your Ears AND Your Eyes

, , , , | Working | September 21, 2020

This happens a number of years ago, back when I am working for a national electronics retail chain.

As I’ve been there a couple of years and want to progress, I sign up to the company-sponsored Retail Workers Accreditation scheme; it’s been so long now that I forget what it was actually called.

We have an external overseer come in who has to monitor my in-store work from time to time. On this particular day, I happen to be working at the checkout and one of our semi-regular customers comes up to the checkout.

I check him out in absolute silence, making hand gestures and writing down his total for him before checking him out.

After he leaves, there is a momentary lull in customers, so the overseer comes to talk to me about my last transaction.

Overseer: “Why did you not speak to that customer or offer any of the addons as per policy?”

Me: “I did offer the addons. He bought an item and I asked if he wanted to buy the batteries for it.”

Overseer: “Impossible. How could you have done that without speaking to him? This doesn’t bode well for you passing this module.”

Me: “What would be the point in speaking to him—”

Overseer: *Interrupting* “It’s important to speak to the customers to make sure they’ve got everything they need, and you need to offer the addons.”

Me: “But he’s deaf, and I know that because he comes in every couple of weeks. If you’d been watching closely, after I scanned the item, I pointed to the batteries, and he declined.”

Overseer: “Oh. Well, that’s different, then. I’ll just go rewrite this assessment form. Good job.”

Needless to say, I passed the module.

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We’re Sure She Remembers The Really Important Stuff

, , , | Healthy | September 21, 2020

I have just had minor surgery and am recovering from the general anaesthetic. The nurse in the ward has been amazing; she brings me a cheese sandwich which, after a day of not eating, was very appreciated. She asks if I want a drink and I say I do. However, after ten minutes pass, she hasn’t brought one. She walks past and suddenly gasps:

Nurse: “Oh, no! I’m so sorry; I forgot your drink. I’ll go get it now.”

She leaves, and after a further wait, I realise she has probably gotten sidetracked with other patients. I remember that I actually have a drink in my bag, so I just grab that.

After a while, the nurse walks past again.

Nurse: “I can’t believe I forgot your drink again! I am so bad at this job!”

At that, she slowly turns around to face the patient she was coming here to see and quickly shouts out.

Nurse: “I didn’t mean that! I promise I’m not bad at this job!”

I cracked up. Thank you, [Nurse], for making my day much brighter.

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Unfiltered Story #208826

, , | Unfiltered | September 21, 2020

This happened to my co-worker.

Co-worker: Hello, are you waiting to be served?
Customer 1: No, I’m waiting for a bus.
Co-worker: Ok then. (she proceeds to serve the next customer in line. After customer two leaves and my co-woker is about to serve a third customer, Customer 1 sheepishly catches her attention)
Customer 1: I’d like some corned beef…

Why The Machines Rise…

, , , , | Right | September 21, 2020

I work in a call centre. When the majority of staff are busy, it’s my job to take customers’ details so they can get back to the customers later on. I have to follow a script for each call.

Me: “Good morning. My name is [My Name]. All our staff are busy at the moment, so can I take your details so we can call you back later?

Customer #1: *Confused* “Are you real? Is this a robot?”

Me: “No.”

Customer #1: “Are you really real?”

Me: “Yes, I’m real. I’m sorry for the confusion; I have to stick to our script.”

Customer #1: “Oh, okay.”

The customer laughs and gives details.

Next call:

Me: “Good morning. [My Name] speaking. All our staff are busy at the moment, so can I take your details so we can call you back later?”

Customer #2: “Is… Is this a machine?” *Sighs*

Me: “No, I’m real. I’m sorry, I have to stick to our script, so I can understand the confusion.”

Customer #2: “Oh, okay, then. It’s just that I’ve gone through a lot of robots and recordings today.”

[Customer #2] gives details. After a while, I get tired of being so professional.

Me: “Good morning. All our staff are busy at the moment, so can I take your details so we can call you back later?”

Customer #3: “What? Is this a robot? This is a machine.”

Me: “Well, if I am, I’m a very nice robot… Beep.”

The customer is clearly confused but chuckling.

Me: *Casual* “Nah, yeah, I’m real…” *Laughing* “This keeps happening today. It’s just our script.”

Customer #3: *Still chuckling* “Well, I hope all the robots there are as nice as you.”

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