Cycling Through Useless Answers

, , , | Right | June 14, 2017

(I’m working at the auto desk in an auto parts and cycle store. There’s a separate desk for the cycling department, but people usually come to the auto desk if the cycling one is busy. This takes place on a hectic Sunday afternoon:)

Customer With Child: “What size is he?”

Me: “Uh… In regards to what, sorry?”

Customer With Child: “What frame size does he need?”

Me: “Oh, I’m not sure. I’m afraid you’ll have to talk with the cycle colleagues for that. Auto colleagues are only trained with car things.”

Customer With Child: “But they’re busy. Just help me or call someone over.”

Me: “All of the cycle colleagues are serving at the cycle desk, but as soon as one is free they’ll be able to help you.”

Customer With Child: “Just tell me the frame size, for f***’s sake!”

Me: “I couldn’t even guess. They can help you at the cycle desk.”

Customer With Child: “Say a number! JUST SAY IT!”

Me: “…3?”

Customer With Child: “Ugh, you’re useless.” *rolls eyes and walks out*

Brightening Up Everyone’s Day

, , , | Working | June 14, 2017

(I and several others have started working as part of an office team, and our manager has been doing an induction. He is wearing a ridiculously bright furry jumper that is almost offensive to the eyes. We have all remarked on it in private, but not directly to him. One man in the group takes serious issue with it, criticising him heavily during our lunch break while he isn’t in the room. It has gotten to the end of the work day and induction.)

Manager: “…and that is pretty much it. Any questions?”

Man: “What’s with that jumper? Are you gay or something?”

Manager: *taken aback* “I am, actually, but that isn’t why I wear it.”

Man: “Okay, why then? I don’t want to have to work with THAT—” *pointing* “—assaulting me every day.”

Manager: “I’m sorry you feel that way. Our commercial manager has a daughter who is autistic, and sometimes she has to bring her in if she can’t find a carer. She responds well to bright colours. She doesn’t fuss as much, she’s more comfortable, and it makes her smile. So I have always tried to wear something bright on the off chance that she appears.”

Man: “It isn’t your responsibility to do that.”

Manager: “But it is. Sometimes life deals you a bad hand and you just have to handle it as best you can. I employed [Commercial Manager] because she’s good, and if wearing a silly bright jumper makes her want to stick around a little longer, then that is something I am willing to do.”

(I was actually moved to tears by this, as was everyone else. The man just grunted and since then made it clear he wasn’t interested in mingling with the rest of us. Thankfully he has an office that he doesn’t come out of often. I’ve also taken to wearing bright cardigans to work. They aren’t as bright as our manager’s, but the commercial manager’s daughter seems to appreciate it. It really brightens your day seeing her come in with a smile from ear to ear at you all in acid green.)

We Expect Better From Hairdressers

, , , , , | Working | June 14, 2017

(I am a gay trans man, but due to being camp and my face structure, people still sometimes read me as female. I’m currently having my hair cut.)

Hairdresser #1: “I was surprised when that customer’s wife came to meet him! With those tight trousers, I was sure he was gay!”

Hairdresser #2: “I know! It’s so hard to tell who’s gay and who’s normal these days!”

Pay It No Mind-Reading

, , , , | Right | June 14, 2017

(I used to manage a high-end fashion store. There are many branches across the UK. A customer approaches me, one who I have had no previous communication with.)

Customer: *holds up non-descript ladies top* “Is this the one my friend saw and liked at [Other Store in Nearby City]?”

Me: *attempting to use psychic ability* “I couldn’t possibly know. What did she say it looked like?”

Customer: “She didn’t. Just that she saw a top she liked in your store.”

Me: “I really can’t help you. You will have to ask your friend.”

Customer: *walks away deflated*

(I wondered if all retail workers are meant to have supernatural abilities, or whether she thought it was just me?)

Different Accents Of Racism

, , , , , | Working | June 14, 2017

(I am a head cashier. I have been called to the checkouts to assist a young couple of Indian descent. After serving them:)

Manager: “It’s a good thing you could handle that. I couldn’t understand a word they were saying.”

Me: “They sounded Glaswegian to me.”

Manager: “How would you know? You’re from Sheffield.”

Me: “Why didn’t you? Haven’t you lived in Glasgow all your life?”

Manager: “True. I wonder why I couldn’t understand them.”

Me: “Racism?”

(She wasn’t best pleased with me.)

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